Relationship Information for Men

How Do I Know If I'm In-love?

webmaster@mensselfesteem.com — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 17:25:00 EST

How Do I Know If I'm In-love?

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Restore the Flame

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

Go to the Podcast
Or Listen on this Podcast Player�-��

How Do I Know If I'm In-love?- I know. I Know. Your'e looking for a list of things to check off to let you know if you are in-love or not. Well, I have that list and I will share it with you! First, let me explain that this check-list is tried and true for ANY real "in-love" relationship. Knowledge is power and with some basics to help you along, you will know for sure if you are "in-love", or not!

Being "in-love" is not the same as just plain "love". Example, I "love" my dog, but I am not "in-love" with my dog. My dog is part of my family, I care very much for her and I spend time with her, but I don't have that huge extra spark, and zest, and deep "I need you in my life" feeling for her, that is required to be "in-love" with her.

To be in-love with someone, there are a few things that are required:

Physical
Emotional
Positive Worry
Can't Imagine Life Without
Oneness of Relationship
Pre-occupied with Love
Love it's self & the Ability to Love
They Bring Out The Best In You

Now, lets explain each of those requirements to be "in-love":

Physical
You have a deep feeling to be physically close to that person, not just sexually, but also as your closest friend. Touching as well as just being physically close by would also be included here.

Emotional
You have a deep emotional draw toward this person. There is something about them that catches your attention much more that anyone else does. Something is happening in your brain (not your body) that yearns for that other person and only being with them satisfies this need.

Positive Worry
You worry about this other person's well being, how their day is going, if they are happy or sad, etc. You have positive feelings toward taking care of that person and want to ensure their happiness.

Can't Imagine Life Without
This one is pretty much self-explainatory. You cannot imagine life without the other person. In many cases, you would feel as though life were not worth living without them being a large part of your life.

Oneness of Relationship
You would have a deep feeling that you and your partner are almost one person and represent yourselves as such. Almost nothing would be done withoiut the other person knowing about it or at least able to share it with them. Just about everything would be shared and you would both share your thoughts with each other totally, with nothing hidden. When others see you individually in a physical sense, they would see both of you mentally.

Pre-occupied with Love
You think about your feelings for the other person on a regular basis and in a positive way throughout the day. You will think about how much you care, how you care, and constantly evaluate those caring aspects.

Love it's self & the Ability to Love
This goes along with being pre-occupied with love, but also includes your own self-evaluation of your ability to love. Do you have the capability to love that person, or anyone in fact? Many people do not have the capacty to love another person due to physical insecurities and a low self-esteem. You would be evaluating your capability to love that person and checking to see if you are doing a good job of loving.

They Bring Out The Best In You
This one is also self-explainatory. Being with the other person, or just thinking about the other person brings out the best in you and may even change you for the better. Many times, having someone to care about and care for will make you a better person, so much so that you would feel different just because you know the other person is a large part of your life.

This check-list to know if you are in-love will be extremely useful if you are in doubt of your "in-love" feelings for someone else. If you are true to your feelings when you ask yourself about this check-list, and you are able to say "yes, this is true for me" about each item, then you are "in-love".

Author- Michael Lafrinere

Comment on this Article:

Does Low Self-esteem Effect Your Relationship?

webmaster@mensselfesteem.com — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 17:24:00 EST

Does Low Self-esteem Effect Your Relationship?

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Restore the Flame

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

Go to the Podcast
Or Listen on this Podcast Player�-��

Does Low Self-esteem Effect Your Relationship?- Men and women with low self-esteem are much more apt to feel responsible for their partner's unhappiness, and to unwittingly sabotage their relationship as a result of low self-esteem, than someone with a high self-esteem. Overly sensitive and insecure partners may also read non-existent meaning into their partners' ambiguous cues, thus leading their relationships to the outcome they wish to avoid. Low self-esteem is a killer to relationships. Sometimes it is even a silent killer, because low self-esteem can manifest itself in many ways. Researchers have found that even after ten years of marriage, people with low self-esteem believe their partners love them far less than they actually do.

In general, your lack of self-esteem will subconsciously drive her away, because you feel that you don't deserve her. Low self-esteem contributes to poor communication and problem solving skills. This causes a rollercoaster relationship and that's no fun at all. Poor communication can include difficulty expressing feelings, not truly listening, assuming what the other means, and berating the other person.

Side Note: Researchers have also found that low self-esteem and materialism are not just a correlation, but also a causal relationship where low self-esteem increases materialism, and materialism can also create low self-esteem. They also found that as self-esteem increases, materialism decreases. simple gestures to raise self-esteem dramatically decreased materialism, which provides a way to cope with insecurities.

Low self-esteem can keep you stuck in a relationship with a critical and insensitive woman because you imagine that no one else would love you or put up with you.

Often men with low self-esteem find others who confirm their feelings about themselves by treating them poorly. These are not healthy situations.

Divorced men consistently cite communication problems as the number one reason for their divorce. Communicating with your partner is not always easy, and at times can seem impossible. With practice, however, we can all learn to become more effective communicators, better listeners, more sensitive men, and ultimately better lovers. What really happens when feelings of rejection surface? Are these feelings truly caused by the behavior of another, or is it because this individual does not feel good about themselves? When an individual has solid self-esteem, another person's behavior cannot shake their basic confidence or feeling of worthiness. It's better to build your self-esteem independently so that it survives regardless of the existence of a relationship.

If a man is lacking in self-esteem, he is unlikely to achieve the level of success in a relationship that he might otherwise achieve. For those men, improving self-esteem becomes a pre-requisite for the journey to success. That is not to say they cannot start that journey and in parallel work on improving their self esteem. In fact, the glow of an improving self-esteem may give extra impetus on the road to success in any relationship from an early stage.

If you are in a relationship, keep in mind how your feelings about yourself may be affecting your interactions with your partner and the course your relationship is taking. It is much easier to be in a relationship when you feel good about yourself. People who have low self-esteem tend to have a harder time seeing their relationships clearly. Get involved with others who enhance you and make you feel good about yourself.

Take time to think about how you feel and practice what you might say in the relationship. Direct communication will be more effective than you ever expected. Additionally, communication in bed is just as important as communication outside the bedroom.

No relationship is perfect all of the time. However, if you are feeling particularly distressed about a relationship, you may want to take the lead as a man, and consider individual or couples counseling. Counseling can help you identity negative patterns which may then improve your current relationship, as well as other relationships you may have in the future.

No grown person should have to hold themselves accountable at the same time to their lover everyday. That's called curfew nad that's for children and teens. Not adults in a relationship. The person trying to have this type of "control" in the relationship is really suffering from a bad case of insecurity a.k.a. low self-esteem. They need to control the situation because they need to control you, and they need to control you because they don't trust that you love them enough to control yourself. This is also a sign of jealousy.

At some point gentlemen, you have to believe in something. You have to believe that you are in a relationship with someone who cares about you and respects you enough to not hurt you.

Author- Michael Lafrinere

Comment on this Article:

Relationship Equality

webmaster@mensselfesteem.com — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 18:00:00 EST

Relationship Equality

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Restore the Flame

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

Go to the Podcast
Or Listen on this Podcast Player -

Relationship Equality- Relationships that stand the test of time are based on principles of equality; both parties feeling as though they're contributing as much as they're getting in return. Show her how much you love her. This doesn't have to cost money either. Just a simple note can brighten her day and in many cases may just get you farther that a dozen roses.

Step 1:
Develop some good communication skills that really work. Many of the root causes of inequality in relationships is miscommunication. Find out your partner's desires, and just as importantly, what are her frustrations in life? The more you understand and know about her position, the better equipped you'll be to improve your role in the relationship that you have together.

Step 2:
Be honest and open in sharing your thoughts and desires in life. Make a true and honest effort to introduce her to your friends and family as an equal partner and that you are now "one". The more invested she feels in your life, the more willing she will be in developing a true partnership that is the foundation of an equal and true loving relationship.

Step 3:
Never decide on relationship matters without your partner. This is the one strongest indicator that you don't take her role in the relationship seriously. You should always err on the side of caution and thoroughly discuss all issues, then decide together.

Step 4:
Be willing to make sacrifices for your partner and for your relationship to survive. There will be many times when you'll have to give up old habits to make her happy. No one says you have to become a different person at all, but you must be willing to accept some degree of change. It says you're willing to embrace compromise and that you're willing to embrace a new life together. You are not in this alone now. This isn't about just you. It's about both of you, in everything that you do. Both of your lives need to change toward each other.

Step 5:
When it comes to money, take note of the little things. There are many techniques that you can use, but most importantly, you need to discuss money matters together. If you feel as though she's overextending herself, you may feel the need to even the score, or even put a stop to it altogether, but never make her feel like the relationship poses an added financial stress. Money matters are touchy and should always be discussed thoughly. Some decisions will need to be made, so make them together.

Your life together, must seem "together" in all ways to her. Additionally, always put her first before anyone else. When she feels safe, secure, and equal in the relationship, you will also feel that security from her.

Talk about everything together
Share everything together
Feel everything together
Learn together
Live your dreams together
Be your unique individual selves together

Being "one" in a relationship is all about being individually unique separately, but living life together as one. Being in a true loving, lasting, and equal relationship does not mean that you have to forget who you once were. You brought your own experiences and separate life into this relationship and so did she. You fell in-love with each other due to these individual traits. Never, ever give up who you are inside. That isn't what needs to change. How you communicate, share, feel, live, and learn, does have to change. True harmony in a relationship can happen, but you must educate yourselves as a couple on how to do just that and always remember that she is the other half of you now. You must educate yourselves on how to live together as "one". When you are in a commited relationship that is supposed to last until you die, you must give up some habits that you had, and gain some that you did not have. Most men are not naturally good communicators, so we must concentrate specifically on those things that we are lacking; especially on communication. She will also need to learn effective communication.

All things in a love relationship must be kept as equal as possible, and that includes decisions. Yes, you are the man of the house, but that does not give you the right to bully her in any way. Her feelings, wants and desires are just as strong as yours and need to be met to the same degree as yours. She needs your repect first of all, then her love for you will shine though. Hold her with utmost respect. Tell her how much you care for her and for your relationship together. Be honest with her and she will be honest with you. Show her that she is equal to you and she will love you equally as much.

Author- Michael Lafrinere

Comment on this Article:

Emotional Steps of Divorce

webmaster@mensselfesteem.com — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 15:55:00 EST

Emotional Steps of Divorce

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Restore the Flame

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

Go to the Podcast
Or Listen on this Podcast Player�-��

The emotional steps, leading from the first shock of betrayal and on, of divorce are similar to the steps in dealing with a death. In the early stages you will sometimes prefer death. Friends will try to help with their professional advice, but mostly they will say "it gets better with time", "You'll be fine", or "You just need time to heal". That's always was a good one! Like if it were only as simple as a broken leg, or hole in the wall that you could fix on your next day off work. Fixing a hole in the wall is something you can grasp and understand. This type pain was beyond understanding. It is a pain that you know would never go away, and your'e right. But there is something about the pain that will be different over time, and there will be certain emotional steps that will take place. After much research, I have developed a list of the most common emotional steps that a man goes through while surviving a divorce.

Denial
Anger, resentment and fear
Withdrawal and grieving
Bargaining
Depression
Numbness and Disorganization (caused by intense emotional suffering).
Acceptance
Action

The first stage of the divorce, denial, typically passes the most quickly. It's the quick hit, and sometimes numbing shock wave, as a man realizes his marriage is over. Anger, resentment and fear are almost always present early on and actually begin the minds healing process, I know it doesn't feel like it, but it is the minds way of beginning to accept life without the other person. Your mind is getting a picture of what life will be like from that point on. It is starting to look toward the future. The bargaining stage is the most active and represents the bulk of active divorce work, covering the most active legal and practical changes that will occur during the divorce. Depression, numbness and disorganization will occur next as the realization of the divorce starts to set in. The final stage represents that time in life during which divorcees are moving far away from their divorce, and into their new life. This stage really has no formal "end," and is marked by the full acceptance of the divorce and a resolution of most of the practical issues and many of the emotional. Time is important here as you cannot speed up the healing process, no matter how hard you try. It just will not happen, so don't even try. Let time pass on it's own and the acceptance step will happen faster than if you tried to speed it.

There is no right or wrong way to work through your individual emotional phases. You will move through these emotional phases and steps in your own way and many of them will occur at the same time. Being aware that they are there and giving them validation, often times will move you farther along your unique path of grief. Be prepared for unexpected reoccurrences in the future, months or even years after you believed that you were through with it, and had moved beyond the reach of the pain.

When the tumultuous roller coaster ride of emotions slows down, you are able to see a different view. The episodes of emotional crisis will occur less frequently. Now it's time to simplify your life. Your emotional baggage will begin to dwindle. Just as in climbing a mountain, our trek is made easier, faster, and safer if the burden we are carrying is as light as possible. Whether we need to clean out the closet and offload material possessions, or extract ourselves from negative people who drag us down, emptying your life of clutter and emotional weights is a major step toward opening yourself up to new possibilities.

Seek counseling to deal with the emotional issues that a divorce creates or re-opens. Divorce is a period of intense upheaval and depression. It is also a great opportunity for a fresh start, and for lasting personal growth. Lean on someone. Balance is another powerful tool in this process. Even as you work through the legal part of the divorce, don't forget you need emotional support. Utilize friends, family, spiritual advisors and, if needed, a therapist to help you deal with the myriad of feelings that accompany this major change in your life.

Developing your self-esteem is also an important step in living through separation and divorce. You should focus on your personal strengths and not be distracted by situations that decrease your confidence. Confidence does not come automatically. It requires a repetition of well-done tasks. Just as a series of failures can destroy your confidence, a series of small successes will build it.

These emotional steps, that you will go through, are hard and painful. This is one of the toughest times in your life and it will feel like it. Do not let your emotions get away from you. Deal with them and let them happen naturally. Fighting these emotions will only hurt you more and for a longer period of time.

Author- Michael Lafrinere

Comment on this Article:

Honing Your Communication Skills

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 21:55:00 EST

The Single Most Important Dimension for Making a Relationship Work

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Success Factor #1

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

Honing Your Communication Skills

The matching of two complete strangers on eHarmony is an exercise in pure communication. It starts with words on a page (or in our case a computer screen), and can quickly move to the telephone or quiet restaurant. But wherever it takes place the majority of a couple�s first weeks together are spent in focused and vitally important communication.

Most people think their communication skills are just fine. It�s easy to progress through life as a relatively happy and productive person with poor communication skills. It�s the type of problem that erodes at your quality of life in subtle, indirect ways. If your appendix becomes infected and starts to swell, you will know in short order. Before long you�ll be in the hospital taking care of a problem that has demanded your attention. Unfortunately for many, poor listening and poor communication skills never grab their attention in the same way. They unknowingly endure the consequences of an ailment they never even recognize. Once you make a commitment to work on your communication skills the results are immediate.

Every relationship you have will improve. It doesn�t matter what relationship it is. It may be a relationship with your boss, a relationship with your closest friend, relationships with the other people on your softball team, or maybe a relationship with the eventual love of your life. Every relationship will get better, and then your own enjoyment of life is going to go up.

I have to tell you that any person who is a great communicator enjoys life more. You have the sense of getting more of the really important innermost stuff from inside of you across to other people. You have the sense of their not only receiving it, but understanding it and liking it, and more than that you have the sense of getting clear about your own inside world for yourself. Your efforts at becoming a better communicator will straighten out the wrinkles of your life. Most wrinkles in life have to do with poor communication. When you aren�t very good at communicating with other people, then all kind of difficulties start occurring. Four things are needed to be a great communicator:

1. You Need to be able to access your innermost thoughts and feelings
Now accessing your innermost thoughts and feelings should be easy, but it�s not. It�s especially difficult for men, but there are a lot of people for who it�s difficult. As I go around the country I talk about the conspiracy that I think has existed in relation to little boys in our culture that has kept them from becoming great communicators. That conspiracy has to do with our fear that they will become sissies and so, in order to keep them away from their tender feelings that might cause them to cry now and then, we keep them away from all their feelings. We get them to hit balls and to shoot baskets and to throw a football with a spiral and we keep them from all their tender thoughts and feelings. Because they�re kept away from all those tender thoughts and feelings they lose contact with those thoughts and feelings. They�re not able to access them at some point in their mid-twenties or early thirties when their new wife says to them, �Let�s talk about deep things. Let�s be intimate with each other.� They just don�t know how to be intimate because they just can�t get hold of what they can share that would be intimate.

2. You need to be able to identify and verbalize these thoughts and feelings
The only way that I know to develop a better ability to verbalize your deepest thoughts and feelings is to practice reflecting on what those thoughts and feelings are until you really have a good hold on those thoughts and feelings, and then constantly practice trying to say what it is you think and feel.

3. You have to be able to accurately understand what another person is saying
One of the things that our research has shown over and over and over again is that it�s not enough just to understand, or to try to understand, where another person is; you have to be able to accurately understand where they are. It is that accurate understanding of another person�s deepest thoughts and feelings that creates a feeling of connection and bonding.

4. You Need to be able to make conversations as personal as possible
In other words, when you�re talking to someone about the weather and they�re going off on a trip, if you can say, �Boy, I can hear some real concern for you about the high winds today, because you�re going to be out in your camper aren�t you?� All of a sudden, you�ve understood the concern they have about the weather. It�s not just concern about high winds, it�s concern about high winds that might affect them in some personal way.

Virtually every conversation you have, if you can not only understand what another person is saying, not only understand what your inner thoughts and feelings are, if but you can make it personal in some way, you turn an ordinary conversation into an intimate conversation. It is intimate conversation that makes people think of you as a great communicator.

Comment on this Article:

The Single Most Important Dimension for Making a Relationship Work

Fri, 22 Feb 2008 21:18:00 EST

The Single Most Important Dimension for Making a Relationship Work

→ Post Your Comments at Bottom of Page ←

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook

Success Factor #1

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

But what does that mean? And is there any one dimension that supercedes the rest?
The fact is EVERY couple gets together because of compatibility. If you were painfully incompatible with a particular person, you probably wouldn�t make it past the first date. Whether we know it consciously or not, most individuals are searching for approximately five dimensions of compatibility.
Sense of humor
Ability to be pleasantly social
Physical attraction
Status
Kindness

If, in the course of several dates together, each person discerns compatibility in these five areas, a relationship is usually born. And it naturally follows that a large number of marriages are based on compatibility, in these five areas as well. So when we say that almost every marriage is based on compatibility it is this narrow compatibility that usually serves as the springboard for two people to move forward together.
For two people who are dating and living apart, these five traits may seem like enough. But with a serious relationship comes the challenges of living together, mixing finances, sharing responsibility and, often times, raising children. Over the years, each of these events turn up the level of stress between two people, and they learn sooner or later, that five dimensions of compatibility doesn�t give them the stability and common ground that they need to weather the storms of life.
At that point, the success of their relationship will often hinge on whether they were lucky enough to stumble into the kind of broad-based compatibility that gives relationships extra support-the kind of compatibility they didn�t even know existed.
So The Person Has to Be Just Like Me?
Of course not. It would be, in fact, impossible to find someone �just like you.� The idea is that every major area of your life where you and your significant other agree is like a deposit in the bank account of your relationship. And every major area where you disagree is like a withdrawal from that account. Is it okay to have several areas of disagreement? Sure. Any account can stand some withdrawals if the balance is nice and high. But if you have a large number of very different opinions in major areas of life, you�re going to draw that balance dangerously low.
eHarmony once received an e-mail from a man who was pointing out how wrong this idea was. �My wife and I are practically opposite in many ways and we�ve been happily married for years.� Because we were curious to hear his story, we developed a friendly back and forth about his situation. When we asked about their differences, he wrote, �I like Chinese food and she likes Italian. I like football and she hates football. I like to sleep late and she gets up early.� But when it came to the more substantial things in life � values, character, curiosity, intellect, work ethic, etc., you probably won�t be surprised to learn that in every �major� dimension of marriage this man and his wife were totally in sync.
You can certainly make the argument that differences in a relationship spice things up. However, it�s easy to see that having major differences in important areas of life require continual compromise. While that may be a valuable exercise in loving sacrifice, over many years it can drain precious energy from a relationship.
The Universal Solvent
High school chemistry often covers the �universal solvent,� which is a substance that has the ability to dissolve both bases and acids. It turns out that the earth�s most abundant molecule, water, has the ability to dissolve most of the compounds we find in nature. In the world of compatibility there is a kind of universal solvent. To be clear, however, the wide variety of people and the combinations that they form as couples make it impossible to identify a universal �most important dimension of compatibility.� Rather, the presence of this universal solvent makes every part of a marriage or a serious relationship more stable, supportive and enjoyable.
We call this dimension, adaptability.
If you and your partner have a deep well of adaptability in your relationship, it acts like a buffer zone between you and serious problems. It cannot make up for a significant disconnect in areas such as character, autonomy or self-concept. But even if one person is highly adaptable, the relationship often just �works.�
When two people are acting authentically in a relationship there will be times of conflict. No two honest people can agree all the time. He will want to go out and she will want to stay home. He may want to visit family and she may want to take a trip to a new place. These disagreements may be minor or major, but if both partners are committed to sitting together and saying, �How can I give on this, and how can you give on this, so we can be together on this?� the relationship will strengthen and grow with each resolution. Adaptability allows us to recognize the power and the benefit of such a compromise, and enjoy the new choice almost as much as our original preference.
Many important dimensions such as intellect, emotional energy and self-concept are established early in our lives and virtually impossible to change. Adaptability, however, can be nurtured and expanded in your relationship. By acknowledging its importance and being mindful of how it can dissolve the areas of friction, you can practice your adaptability and watch it have greater and greater impact on the �acids and bases� that you experience.
Comment on this Article:

Beaten Man Syndrome

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:16:00 EST
Beaten Man Syndrome.

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook
My name is Dave, I live in Australia. This is about your E-Mail about the beaten man. I don't consider myself a beaten man but some of us out here in the real world have an aversion to pain, you know the "getting your guts kicked in" type of pain? I have tried some of your techniques and still had no success, just more kicks in the guts for my troubles, and I don't know about you but I have a pain thresh-hold and have reached it, getting rejected or laughed at by women is painful no matter what you tell yourself when you get to your pain limit. What are you supposed to do when this happens? You can say what you like about calling it a setback but when you get to the stage that you start avoiding women because you don't want to be laughed at or rejected it is not a setback, it is a confidence killer. No amount of self reinforcement helps when you get to this point, one more rejection or one more woman laughing at you is too much to take. The only even partial success I have had was with a married woman and I didn't know she was married until near the end of our chat, this made things worse not better, unlike most men you target with your advice, I have morals. I won't try to chat up a married woman, if she wants to start a relationship with me she has to end her existing relationship beforehand, this woman was looking for that little bit extra on the side and seemed quite upset when I told her "Thanks But No-Thanks." My theory is that if she would cheat on her husband then she would cheat on me, even if she got divorced to be with me, what do you think?. Solve this in the real world not in fantasy land. Dave =============================================================== My Response: First off, Dave, all my advice is based on the "real world." Judging from your writing, it's YOU who lives in a fantasy land. You live in a fantasy land where no girls like you, where they will ALL reject you and laugh at you. This is a magical place where you can't get a date and are destined to die alone, and anyone who tells you otherwise is a LIAR. It's a mystical, magical world you've created in your head because you want to feel sorry for yourself and don't want to do the hard work (yes, that's right, HARD WORK) to get what you want. You'd rather just be lazy and feel sorry for yourself. This is something all "beaten men" have in common. They're called "beaten" for a reason. They've given up hope. They look at their lives as a lost cause, and resign themselves to "cursing the world" and the all women as hating them so they can feel justified in their hopeless beliefs. You believe this, and yet you have gone to great lengths to contradict yourself in your own email. You claim that no women like you and they all laugh at you and reject you. Yet, there's this woman, who happens to be married, who expressed ATTRACTION for you! Now, obviously you have a standard that you abide by where you don't go after women who are married, which is fine. I have the same standard, but I can't expect everyone to live by it. Each manmust have his own rules that he feels comfortable with. But instead of looking at this as a positive thing -- that being a woman was attracted to you and liked you and actually WANTED to be with you -- you saw it as a negative -- She's married, so I'm just wasting my time! Shame, shame, shame on you. No one knows better than me how hard it can be when you're trying to go from "Beaten Man" to "best man." I worked very hard at this myself when the first inklings of "Art Of Approaching" were being developed from me going out 5 nights a week to try and break this fear of meeting women that I had. I was so obsessed with getting good at meeting women, I would show up for my job the next day half-asleep because I was out late the night before. I almost got fired numerous times! I was getting physically ill from the lack of sleep, and when I first started, I was getting rejected left and right. But I kept at it, figured a few things out, and before long, it became easy! And I suddenly didn't have to go out 5 nights a week, I could go out just when I wanted and have fun! If I had believed as you do, this story would not have a happy ending, and I probably wouldn't even be responding to your email, because I'd just be some other guy who couldn't talk to women. So coming from someone who's overcome this obstacle in the REAL WORLD, and not your depressing, negative fantasy land of evil women who hate you, listen to me when I say this... IF YOU FOCUS ON THE NEGATIVES, YOUR VIEWS WILL BE NEGATIVE. IF YOU FOCUS ON THE POSITIVES, YOUR VIEWS WILL BE POSITIVE. This is something ALL men who are suffering from "beaten man" syndrome should take to heard. You should memorize those two sentences and make them your mantra. Your beliefs shape how you see the world. And how you see the world shapes your beliefs. If you walk up to a woman, and say "Hi, let me buy you a drink." And she responds: "Um, you should leave now," and then turns her back to you (which actually did happen to me once when I first started out, but that's another article, lol), you have two ways of viewing that interaction. The first way is "Oh God! I'm ugly and no girls like me! That rejection hurt so bad! Everyone saw that! I'm a loser! I can't talk to any other girl in this place now! Waaaaaaaaaaah!" The other way is "Wow, that didn't work out so well. Why is that? Maybe every guy in this place has used that same line on her andmshe's sick of it? I wonder what would happen if I used a different line?" Do you see the difference? In one example, I automatically reverted to despair, pain, rejection, negativity. I heaped blame on myself for failing. In the other example, I was still hurt, but I looked at the situation as a learning experience where I figured out what I might have done wrong and came up with a solution. There is a WORLD of difference between these two points of view. You, dear Dave, and every beaten man like you, has trained himself to look at things in terms of your own failures. You selfishly indulge in your own feelings of loss and inadequacy. This is what continues to beat you down. The guys who are successful with women learn from these experiences. They start to spot specific traits in women that they know they're good at attracting. They figure out what works and what doesn't, and only do the stuff that works. They enjoy the success of their hard work, and they revel in the good feelings they have while dismissing the bad ones. Which sounds more appealing to you? Getting rejected by women can be a confidence killer and can be painful IF YOU LET IT. You have to learn to adapt and do what works instead of focusing on your pain. You say you've done "some of my techniques" to no success. Have you bothered to buy my book? Have you read it cover to cover? Did you do the Bootcamp, which is specifically DESIGNED to help you improve WITHOUT all the pain of rejection? Have you done the confidence building exercises I give you? Have you learned to read a woman's body language to recognize who's open to being approached so you can minimize your "crash and burn?" Have you bothered to do ANY of this work? I'm willing to bet you haven't. Because if you had, your email would have been a success story rather than a whine-fest. It always amazes me when I see guys who say "There was this one girl who was really into me, but X was wrong with her, so I didn't go forward, and no other women like me." Let me tell you, if one woman likes you,there are others out there who do as well. You just have to find them, and do the work it takes to be prepared for meeting them. Now, I know this article sounds harsh, but I'm trying to get through to you and every other guy out there like you what it is you're doing wrong that you need to fix, and sometimes that requires tough love. But I'm not just going to spew tough love. I'm going to actually give you some tools to help you overcome this rough patch in your road to success with women (note that I haven't given up on you, though you may have!). If you're stuck, and you need that extra push to help you out and go from "beaten man" to "ladies man," then this special Package is for you. And for those of you who just want to get the basic, bare-bone fundamentals of what it takes to meet massive amounts of women with no fear of rejection, then you owe it to yourself to check out my original ebook, The Art Of Approaching, by clicking on the picture below:

Beware EVIL Women!

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:15:00 EST
EVIL WOMEN.

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook
Just like all things, there is good, and there is evil. The good can be a tremendously positive force in your life, filling it with joy and happiness. The evil, however, can cause tremendous pain, suffering, and even DEATH. It's no different with women. There are good women in this world, and there are women that can only be described as EVIL. The purpose of this email is to help you spot the bad ones so you can save yourself from untold suffering and focus all your attention on finding a good woman that you can have amazing experiences with. The first thing I want to say about EVIL women is that it is important to spot them early! And once spotted, it is important not to have any type of contact with them if you want to enjoy complete happiness in your love life. Of course, sometimes it can be very tempting to have a one-night stand or hot-and-heavy fling with a woman who is bad for you. Andsometimes, everything can turn out okay. But that doesn't mean you're not still playing Russian Roulette with your love life! The best defense against EVIL WOMEN is knowing the type of woman you want. EXACTLY the type of woman you want. When you know what you want, your search for the woman that's right for you becomes much narrower and focused, so instantly you filter out a great many of the women you'll be wasting your time with. For instance, let's say you're looking for a serious girlfriend... What are the things you'd want in a woman who's going to be a good girlfriend? Let's say you'd like a woman who really enjoys outdoor activities (because that's what you enjoy). So you're girlfriend has to be an avid outdoorsman. BOOM! You've just narrowed your search and eliminated a good 90% of the EVIL women that are out there. But there's still that 10% you have to look out for. The next thing you should be aware of is if she is in a profession that lends itself to "unbalanced" personalities. For instance, if the girl is, or has ever been, a stripper, a prostitute, or a porn actress, her chances of causing you incredible amounts of trouble are EXTREMELY great. And we're not just talking about the mental trouble either, they could very well give you a disease from which you may never recover! Another thing to look out for is self-destructive habits. If you notice the woman you're with is a heavy drug user or alcoholic... RUN. Do not get seriously involved with women who drink too much, do too many drugs, or both. These are women who will care more about the substances they abuse than YOU. And they are also women who care nothing about themselves, and getting emotionally attached to someone who cares nothing for their well-being is a painful endeavor. Some people criticize me for saying this, but I do believe it... BEWARE SINGLE MOTHERS! If you're getting involved with a woman who already has a kid, you're opening yourself up for a great deal of trouble down the line. Why? Because if she got pregnant once by some other guy,chances are she'll get pregnant by YOU! Even if you use birth control! And if she DOES get pregnant, chances are she'll go ahead and have the baby. This means that whether you break up with her or not, you'll be stuck paying child support for the next 18 years! Now, if the idea of shelling out your hard-earned cash for a kid you never wanted to a woman you don't like for the next 18 years of your life doesn't appeal to you -- STAY AWAY FROM SINGLE MOMS! In addition to that warning above, single moms will always choose their kids over you, which means you will always get the short end of the stick when it comes to her time and attention. So if you want lots of sex and adventures in your relationship, you can throw that away when dealing with a single mom! And not only that, but depending on what state you live in, if her kid gets attached to you, you might be legally liable for child support EVEN IF IT ISN'T YOUR KID! Check your local laws to be certain. Watch out for women who are too clingy and get jealous easily! These are women who are incredibly insecure, and most likely they will cheat on you! In fact, the more jealous they are, the more likely it is they are sleeping around. This is because people tend to project their own behaviors on others, and if they think you're cheating on them, chances are it's because they, themselves, are cheating (or thinking about it!). Watch how the woman treats her own family. Typically, women who have good relationships with their mother AND father are well balanced women who will treat you well. If they hate EITHER of their parents, chances are they're going to end up treating you the same way. As a side note to this, loot at how her parents treat each other if you get the chance. If their relationship is a good one, chances are the relationship you have with her will be good too! The same is true if the parents have a BAD relationship. Also, look to see if the woman you like also likes children. It doesn't matter if you want to have kids or not. If a woman does not like kids, that's a statement about her own capacity to love and nurture! If she hates kids, then it's a very good possibility she is incapable of deep commitment and personal connection, and will end up using and abusing the man she is with! And finally, if you find out that you're with an EVIL WOMAN, do not hesitate to DUMP her immediately! And when I say dump, I mean DUMP. Delete her number from your phone, do not see her or talk to her again. Cut her out of your life completely! And if she comes crawling back to you promising to change, DO NOT TAKE HER BACK. She won't change, and she'll make your life even WORSE than it was when you were with her before. Be strong and leave her behind completely, and work towards finding a good, positive woman to have in your life. You can't protect yourself 100% from EVIL women, but if you follow the guidelines I've given you above, then you have an extremely good chance of filtering them all out. So how do you find yourself a good woman? Well, odd enough as it sounds, the quality of the woman you can get directly depends on how high you value yourself! This means building a strong self-image that you can present to the world. In the book, The Art Of Approaching, it goes into great detail on how to do this. Everything from building extreme confidence with women, to how to get them to go out with you is in there! If you haven't checked out the book yet, you can do so by clicking on the picture below:

How To Call A Woman To Ask Her Out

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:14:00 EST

How To Call A Woman To Ask Her Out

-By David DeAngelo, Author of�Double Your Dating

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

�� I have a question for you...

�� When you get a woman's number and you're picking up the phone to call and "ask her out", does it bother you?

�� Do you get freaked out?

�� Do you start thinking about exactly what you're going to say, how you're going to say it, how to deal with her rejecting you... etc.?

�� Do you ever get NERVOUS when you're dialing the phone?

�� You know that feeling when you just start getting anxious for no logical reason, and you just CAN'T control it?

�� Have you ever had to actually HANG UP because you were so damn freaked out... and you just couldn't follow through with it?

�� OK, now another set of interesting questions...

�� Have you ever called a woman, and started talking to her, only to realize that she was in a COMPLETELY different mood from the last time?

�� Have you ever had a woman "turn cold" on you all of a sudden?

�� It's almost like you're talking to a different person from the girl you met just a day or two before... and it makes no sense to you... right?

�� And finally...

�� Have you ever worked up the nerve to call, gotten her on the phone, had a great conversation, but when it came time to ask her out, you froze up because you didn't know what to say?

�� Or even worse, have you ever gotten to the end of the conversation and asked her out, only to have her answer with:

"Well, maybe... call me Friday afternoon... OK?"

or...

"Actually, I'm going to be busy all this week, but thanks for asking... (silence)"

...?

�� Have you ever had one of those conversations where you could just TELL that something wasn't right... and that she wasn't going to be taking you up on your date offer, or calling you back at all anytime soon?

�� So why all the problems?

�� What is it about this particular few minutes of time that constantly ends in problems for guys?

�� I personally think that this issue comes down to a few key DEEPER ISSUES.

�� And I think that if you don't have these other issues "handled", you're going to keep running into problems... and NEVER even know WHY...

�� ...which sucks.

�� I mean, it's bad enough to keep having a particular problem and not figure out how to solve it... but the idea that the solution is in doing something you would never think of is a little bit maddening.

�� In other words, I think that this is all about understanding the problem, and actually PREVENTING it from coming up... rather than trying to "solve it" in the moment.

�� Let me put it this way...

�� If you're dialing the phone, and you're starting to feel nervous, then it's already too late to solve the problem.

�� No quick fix will help you.

�� Or if you're on the phone with her and you have just asked her out on a date, and she says "Um, let me call you back in a few days and tell you"... and you start to get that sinking feeling because you know she's blowing you off... IT'S TOO LATE.

�� There's no "magic pill" at this point.

�� The answer is PREVENTION.

THE MAGIC FORMULA

�� So let's take a few minutes and talk about the issues and what CAUSES them.

�� Here are some of the "root causes", and how I see them...

1) Having no other options.

�� If you're sitting at the phone with ONE phone number in your hand, and you haven't been out on a date in a long time, and you are feeling DESPERATE, you're probably going to get VERY nervous.

�� When you have no other options, the single one in front of you becomes VERY valuable.

�� Translation: You want it TOO badly.

�� This AUTOMATICALLY triggers your emotional system, because at some level you realize that if you screw this up, it's all over. And you know that it's all going to happen in just an few SECONDS.

�� The pressure is too much!

2) Putting too much importance on a single girl.

�� Now, if you have a girl that you've been dating for six months, and you've decided that she's one in a million, it makes sense to put a lot of importance on your relationship with her.

�� But if you don't know a girl very well, or you haven't even dated her at all, then you are only setting yourself up for major disappointment by putting too much importance on ANY girl.

3) Thinking you need to IMPRESS her.

�� This is a HUGE issue.

�� Most men "unconsciously" behave and communicate like they're trying to IMPRESS the woman of their desires.

�� When you think about this, it only makes sense... of course you'd want to impress the woman you like... so she'll think you're a cool guy and want to be with you.

�� But have you ever thought for a moment how an interesting, attractive woman sees it when a guy is TRYING to IMPRESS her?

�� Well, here's the INSTANT and UNCONSCIOUS response that women have:

�� "He's trying to hard. There's something wrong. This guy must have something he's trying to hide... and he must be pretty insecure."

�� In other words, the INSTANT you do something or say something that is an obvious attempt at impressing a woman, her radar system screams:

"WUSSY!"

4) Having expectations and being attached to them.

�� You might think of this one as a variation of "wanting it too much"... only slightly different.

�� When you start getting your hopes and expectations up, you begin to get ATTACHED to them.

�� Then you run the risk of HOLDING ON TOO TIGHT to your little fantasy.

�� Bad idea.

�� Women don't date guys who assume too much, act too comfortable, or fall for them too quickly.

�� Remember, beautiful women have guys falling for them left and right.

�� In fact, they almost EXPECT guys to go out on one or two dates with them, then say "You know, I really like you..." and other equally predictable sentiments.

�� Just like being desperate can destroy your chances with a woman, liking a woman too much, too fast, and creating expectations leads to crazy, stupid mistakes as well.

�� Now, think over what I just said...

�� I'm basically saying that if you want to cure the problem of freaking out when you call women to ask them out, and the problem of screwing it up when you have that first conversation and ask them out the first time, then you have to go INSIDE first... and do some preventative maintenance on yourself.

�� And the GOOD NEWS is that this stuff is not only good for you, it also helps you get even MORE dates with interesting women.

�� So here's what to do about this particular problem:

1) Get more options.

�� If you go out one evening with a couple of friends, and you meet a REALLY hot girl... and you wind up having a fun conversation, and getting her number, what should you do?

�� RIGHT! Go get at least ONE MORE girl's number. More, if you can.

�� This way, when you're picking up the phone to call (or sending out emails, or whatever), you've got another woman to call right after her...

�� In other words, if it doesn't go well, no big deal. No sweat at all.

�� Instead of putting all your "hopes" in this one situation, go get more options... this will prevent many problems, as well as giving you more women to date!

�� And think about it... when are you MOST likely to get a woman's phone number? When are you the most likely to be in a great mood that actually ATTRACTS women?

�� Exactly... in the moments after you've already gotten another woman's number.

�� So take advantage of this time!

2) Dial the phone expecting it to NOT work out with this girl.

�� I have news for you: Most women have something about their personality, behavior, future plans, etc. that is going to disqualify them from being good "potential mates" for you.

�� Now, I'm not saying that "all women are screwed up", etc.

�� What I AM saying is that you need to realize that the only reason you're freaking out so much is because your EMOTIONS are running the show.

�� You need to think about how rare it is that you actually meet a girl that is COMPATIBLE with you... that you'd enjoy spending time with even if she wasn�t good-looking.

�� If you have this in mind as you're dialing the phone, you won't have that "I'm desperate" vibe going on.

�� You won't be talking like a guy who has a gun to his head, either... which is a good thing... because women get weirded-out by this kind of thing.

3) Instead of asking a woman out, tell her what you're doing, and then tell her she can come along if she wants.

�� Why is "asking a woman out" early on a bad idea? Because if you don't have a world-class understanding of male/female dynamics, you're going to come across as a guy who is trying to use food as date-bait.

�� In other words, if the first thing out of your mouth is "I'd like to take you out to dinner" it's going to be interpreted as "I don't think you're probably going to accept an invitation to spend time with me unless I throw in something extra...".

�� Weak.

�� And that's how SHE sees it.

�� The alternative?

�� Tell her that you're going to be doing something, and that she should join you.

�� "Hey, I'm going to go down to Starbucks and get a cup of tea. You should join me. I'm way more fun than whatever else you were going to do... and that's a fact!"

�� Extra bonus points:

�� Hint that she's missing out if she doesn't accept immediately.

�� If she hems and haws, or hesitates... just interrupt and say "Hey, you're the one who's missing out".

�� I also like "You know, never mind. I guess you don't like to have fun...".

�� Great stuff!

�� This is solid Cocky & Funny material, and it's the right time to use it.

�� You know, I personally used to get VERY freaked out when calling women for the first time on the phone... and "asking them out".

�� Now that I understand this particular "moment in time" better, and now that I understand more of the "dynamics" of what's going on, I get MUCH better results personally...

�� In fact, I never get "nervous" anymore when calling women, and I rarely if EVER have a woman "flake out" on me.

�� Now, in this newsletter I've shared a few points to help you get better results in this particular area. Use them. They'll definitely help you.

�� You should read this newsletter right before you call every one of the next 10 women you meet... in fact.

�� But as you can probably tell, this is just one of MANY important facets of success with women.

�� In fact, this is just scratching the surface of the skills you'll need if you want to have CONSISTENT success with the most DESIRABLE women.

�� The reality of this situation is that if you want to take control of this area of your life, and not walk helpless with women anymore, you're going to need to take more steps to get yourself educated on this topic.

�� And what's the best way to do that quickly, easily, and without spending years of time and lots of money learning the HARD WAY?

�� My eBook, Double Your Dating.

�� It will take you step-by-step through all the key theories, concepts, and techniques you'll need to start meeting and dating more women starting IMMEDIATELY.

�� And here's another interesting benefit that comes from going through my eBook...

�� It actually CHANGES HOW YOU SEE THE WORLD.

�� The first time you read it, you'll be hitting your head saying "Ah ha! Ah ha!" the whole time.

�� All of those things that have happened to you with women will start to make sense.

�� All of the times you screwed up will stop bothering you, because you'll "get" what happened... and all of the times that things worked will also make sense.

�� Of course, you'll also be shaking your head as you learn some of the most amazing techniques for approaching women, getting numbers, getting dates, and taking things to a more "physical level" that have ever been created (For example, I share some of my own personal favorite "pick up lines" that work better than anything I've ever heard of for approaching women... and I don't share these anywhere else except my audio and video programs and intensive live seminars).

�� But one of the REAL benefits comes AFTER you go through it. This is when the real MAGIC starts to happen.

�� When you're out at restaurants watching the couple at the next table, you'll UNDERSTAND what is happening.

�� When a woman starts doing something subtle that you would have never noticed before, you'll SEE it... and she'll SEE that you see it... and you will instantly be talking to her on a DIFFERENT LEVEL... all because you know something that most other guys don't.

�� When you encounter "resistance" or "problems" or "tests" from women, you will no longer need to get nervous or upset, because you'll know what TO DO about it... and when you actually DO the right thing you'll see that problem disappear.

�� The point that I'm trying to make is that this education will not only teach you techniques for meeting women, it will also give you a new POWER that you never had before.

�� I can honestly say to you that if this program were available five or so years ago when I started learning this stuff, I would have gladly traded ANYTHING I owned for it... or paid any amount of money.

�� But it wasn't, so I had to take YEARS figuring all of this stuff out for myself.

�� This eBook is priceless, and it's worth at least ten times what I sell it for. As you probably know, you can order it WITHOUT RISK as well.

�� Order and try it out. If you're not happy, just say "no thanks" and I'll refund your money. No questions, no hassles.

�� I'm that confident that it will take your success with women to a whole new level.

�� Click the link below for all of the details, and be sure to sign up for my free newsletter while you're at it:

Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook

�� I'll talk to you again soon.

�� Your Friend,

�� David D.

P.S. If you'd like to send me a Success Story, Question, or Comment, follow these guidelines:

1) Keep it short and to the point. Two paragraphs max.

2) Tell me what's working for you before you ask your question. I appreciate all of the "Your stuff is great" and "I don't need to tell you how well your stuff works" comments, but the fact is that I DO need to hear all of the specifics... because this helps other guys to see what's working in different situations.

3) If you have a Success Story, write "Success Story" in the subject line of the email. I read these first.

4) At the end of the email, give me your initials and tell me where you're from.

5) Send it to me at:

SuccessStories@DoubleYourDating.com

...Thanks!

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

David DeAngelo is the author of "Double Your Dating - What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women", and has taught thousands of men how to be more successful with women and dating.
Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. Double Your Dating and David DeAngelo are trademarks of David DeAngelo Communications Inc. You agree to all of the following by accepting and reading this: You understand this to be an expression of opinions and not professional advice. It is only to be used for personal entertainment purposes. You are solely responsible for the use of the ideas, concepts, and content and hold David DeAngelo Communications Inc. and all members and affiliates harmless in any event or claim. If you are under the age of 18, please go to the link at the end of this e-letter to stop receiving it or send mail to "DDMI" 3960 Howard HughesPkwy, 5th Floor Las Vegas, NV 89109.

How To Tell If She's Interested

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:14:00 EST

Dating Tips: How To Tell If She's Interested
-By David DeAngelo

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above
OK, I have a quick trick question for you.

That's right, I said a quick TRICK question.

How can you tell if a woman is interested in you?

Answer quickly.

So what gives?

Why am I asking you a trick question?

Simple.

Because I'm trying to make you THINK.

I'm sure that, just like me, you've read a hundred dating tips and articles that say things like:

"If she tilts her head to one side and strokes
her neck, that's a sign of interest..."

"If she licks her lips in a longing fashion,
that means she's interested in you..."

"If she laughs a lot, makes positive eye contact,
and touches you often, then she likes you..."

DUH!

I remember when I first read all this stuff.

I thought to myself "Wow, cool! I must have been missing these hints because I didn't know to look for them. Now I'll know when a woman is interested in me...".

Well, there was ONE SMALL problem...

The problem is that women display these MAJOR INTEREST signals in about 1 of 1,000 interactions with men...

And there was one BIG problem...

That problem was that none of the damn dating tips I read said a single thing about how to MAKE women give you these signals.

In other words, what I realized is that average guys like me who don't get "approached" by women need to learn not only WHAT to look for, but, more importantly, how to actually CREATE ATTRACTION in women so they GAVE me these signals in the FIRST PLACE.

So let me share with you some dating tips on how to MAKE women feel ATTRACTION for you... and then I'll share some ideas on what to LOOK FOR to tell if a woman is interested.

And my ideas will be a WEEEEEE BIT different than the ones you read in your flirting books.

OK, so you're out at a bar with a few friends, and it's time to meet some interesting women.

You look around, and none of the hot young babes in there seem to be tilting their heads to one side, looking you in the eye, and licking their lips... so you decide to DO SOMETHING.

What do most guys do in this situation?

Either:

1) Nothing, because they're scared, or...

2) Something typical, like ask a girl to dance, or if he can buy her a drink.

If you're guilty of doing these, raise your hand.

Then take your raised hand, and slap yourself silly. Not too hard. But silly.

Here's a thought for you...

If you put 100 guys in a bar with one beautiful women sitting alone, and you say to all 100 of the guys "Hey guys, which one of you can walk over to that woman and do something to make that woman feel a SEXUAL ATTRACTION for you?"... I'd say that
if you're LUCKY, one of them will claim that he can do it.

In other words, for most guys, the idea of walking up to a girl they don't know and doing something that will TRIGGER an attraction is completely outside of their universe.

This is one of the reasons why guys do things like asking girls to dance, buying them drinks, etc.

Now, something you must understand when it comes to women and ATTRACTION is that women don't feel ATTRACTION for WUSSIES.

ATTRACTION isn't a CHOICE.

It isn't logical (at least, on the surface).

But once you start to "get it", everything changes. Your entire perspective changes once you "get it", and your results change instantly as well.

So here's a dating tip for you to try:

MESS WITH WOMEN.

That's right "mess with" them.

Tease.

Bust on.

Be difficult.

Why?

Because it INSTANTLY communicates that:

1) You could care less what she thinks of you.

2) You're a fun person.

3) You're unpredictable.

4) You're a bit of a "wild card"

5) You GET IT.

Now, you might be shaking your head right now and saying "That's doesn't make any sense. Why would a woman feel attracted to me if I mess with her instead of being nice?".

That's a good question.

But for now, take the hand that you slapped yourself with earlier, and slap yourself again.

Good.

I want you to STOP following your "be nice and kiss ass" instincts when you first meet a woman, and instead practice MESSING WITH HER.

Make fun of something.

Go to hand her something, then pull it away at the last second.

Shake your head in despair and tell her that she's screwing up her chances with you.

Say something Cocky & Funny, then turn around and walk away before she can respond to your face.

Can ya feel me, dog?

Now the good stuff...

HOW TO TELL IF SHE'S INTERESTED

Well this is what you were looking for, so here it is...

I'm going to give you a stupid-proof formula for knowing whether or not a woman is interested in you.

Here it is:

1) You engage her.

2) She engages you back.

Yes, that's it. Please stop the applause long enough that I can finish. You can clap later.

I know that this sounds a little "Duh-ish", but stay with me here.

If I walk into a restaurant, and the hostess asks me how many are in my party, and I answer with "Well, there are three of us. I guess there will be FOUR if YOU join us..." and she laughs at my joke, then IT'S ON!

If I'm standing at the bar, and the woman next to me bumps into my arm, and I turn and say "Hey, watch it, OK? Keep some space here, I need at least a foot of room..." in a serious tone of voice... and she starts playing along by smiling and moving away from me then back again playfully, then IT'S ON!

If I'm talking to a woman that I met at the magazine rack, and I ask her "What's with that huge purse of yours? You got a dog in there or something?" and she starts laughing and making excuses, then IT'S ON!

In a nutshell, what I'm trying to say is:

1) Stop looking around for signals from women that they're "interested" in you.

2) Stop CARING whether or not a particular woman is interested in you.

3) Instead, start TRIGGERING the interest, and watching to see if women ENGAGE. If they do, then assume that IT'S ON!

As long as you use how she's responding to what YOU do as your gauge, then you'll have a MUCH easier time spotting the "she wants me" clues...

...Because YOU ARE THE ONE CAUSING THEM.

Now...

...if you want DOZENS AND DOZENS of great dating tips and ideas for making women feel that powerful "chemistry" with you, then go download a copy of my online ebook here:

Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook

This tool took me countless hours to develop...

Stop beating your head against the wall, and start taking advantage of the years I've spent learning this stuff. You'll be SO glad you did.

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above
And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. "David DeAngelo" and "Double Your Dating" are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

How To Act On The First Date

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:13:00 EST

Dating Tips Q&A: How To Act On The First Date
By David DeAngelo

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

***THIS WEEK'S QUESTION***

"How should I act on the first date? What should we talk about? How do you keep the conversation interesting?"

These are all questions that I get asked often in one way or another, and in this dating tip I'd like to address this topic.

***MY COMMENTS***

The first thing to remember when you're meeting up with a girl for "a date" is that it's NOT an INTERVIEW.

You're not applying for a job (and neither is she), so don't act like it.

It's so funny to me when I sit down in a restaurant and I hear a couple that's obviously out on their first date... and the guy has no idea what to do.

It sounds like this:

"So, did you grow up around here?"

"Where did you go to school?"

"Do you have brothers and sisters?"

"What kinds of things do you like to do for fun?"

Painful.

Why is it that people tend to act like they're on job interviews when they go out on dates?

It's just such the not-right thing to do.

I mean, no wonder women sit around with each other and complain about how hard it is to find an interesting guy in this world.

Here's a good rule of thumb:

ONLY ASK QUESTIONS OR TALK ABOUT COMMON, BORING, PREDICTABLE TOPICS LIKE SCHOOL, WORK AND FAMILY IF YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY RUN OUT OF ALL OTHER OPTIONS.

And why is this?

Good question. And I'm glad you asked.

First, let's talk about WHY most guys allow the conversation to turn to these ultra-boring topics...

Most guys approach a first date from the perspective of "I don't want to screw this up".

In other words, they try to play it safe and not do anything or say anything that the girl might not like.

They try to present themselves as "nice guys" who love mom, have a good job, and are stable.

Somehow, guys have gotten the idea that if they act nice, buy dinner, and talk about the same old things that everyone else uses to bore women to tears that they might get lucky and score (or at least get a kiss and a second opportunity to buy dinner).

I don't know where this concept came from, but it's just not a very effective approach.

WOMEN AREN'T ATTRACTED TO THE SAME OLD SAME OLD, BORING, PREDICTABLE CONVERSATION.

Attraction happens when there is energy, spice, humor, mystery... COCKY AND FUNNY... and saucy.

So if you want to create ATTRACTION instead of BOREDOM, you're going to have to learn a new way.

You're going to have to learn to talk about something else.

The trick to not talking about the "usual" things is to know how to make conversation INTERESTING.

Let me ask you, what are the most INTERESTING topics to humans in general?

Right - drama, violence, scandal, and comedy that is painful to one of the parties involved.

Here are a few good ideas for conversation that come to mind:

"So what's with The Osbournes being MTV's #1 show of all time? I guess people just can't get enough of dysfunctional family life... they have to watch it on TV too."

"I'm so bummed that J-Lo and Ben are on the rocks. They were so damn cute together. I was hoping that they'd have a daughter with perfect hair and a bedonka donk butt from birth."

"Have you tuned into this "Cheaters" TV show? Don't you just love it when they come storming into someone's house and catch the wife in bed with another guy on national TV?"

These topics will light up a conversation like nobody's business. And they create all kinds of opportunities to be cocky and funny while talking about the misfortunes and neurotic behavior of others.

The trick is that you must remember you're not there to impress her, and you're not on a job interview.

The more you act nervous, stilted, and uncomfortable...like you're trying to impress her and get her approval... and like you don't want to say anything that might make her disapprove of you, the less likely you are to trigger that all- important ATTRACTION inside of her.

And here's a real twist on this theme:

If SHE starts asking the "normal" questions about school, job, family, etc. this is a perfect opportunity to bust on her and say "What, is this a job interview?"

Or "Can't you think of something interesting to talk about? Please, spare me the pain of the usual school-job-family conversation. Let's save that until we're picking names for our kids."

Here are a few other good ideas for conversation:

1) History. Women love to hear stories about the history of places. If you're in an interesting part of town, tell her the story of how the area came to be named, or why the city was built where it is. And if the story involves a tale of love and/or scandal, all the better.

2) Anything superficial, classy, and basically meaningless. Try learning a little about fashion, this way you can make fun of it while acting like you know what you're talking about. "Didn't Madonna really screw up the fashion world with this whole over-the-top fake cowboy look thing?"

3) Comedy Psychological Analysis. Have fun by giving your wild perspective on others. "You know, I've been trying to figure out why so many people these days are going postal and shooting everyone. I think it might be all the NSYNC, Britney Spears, and Backstreet Boys on the radio." This one can be a lot of fun... be creative.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

If you want to keep her interest, then you have to be INTERESTING.

The old-fashioned act-like-you're-on-a-job interview rap just doesn't cut it.

Now, for some guys, the ideas that I've just talked about will make sense, but they won't come naturally.

That's OK. You may have to work on this for awhile, especially if you've spent the last 25 or so years doing the wrong thing.

Old Proverb: "No matter how far down the wrong road you've gone, TURN BACK."

So remember, attraction isn't a choice. And attraction doesn't make logical sense. If you want to create that magical "chemistry", then you're going to have to LEARN and PRACTICE it.

...and if you'd like to learn DOZENS of great ideas on how to meet, attract, date, and get physical with women, I recommend that you download a copy of my online eBook "Double Your Dating," and sign up for my free Dating Tips Newsletter. Just go do:

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above
�� �� Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook� �� �
____________________________________________________

David DeAngelo is the author of "Double Your Dating -� What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women", and has taught thousands of men how to be more successful with women and dating.
_________________________________________________________________

Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. "David DeAngelo" and "Double Your Dating" are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

Initial Conversations With Women

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:12:00 EST

Initial Conversations With Women, Not Being A Wussy, And Other Gems...
By David DeAngelo

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

***SUCCESS STORY:

Hey Dave,��

Just wanted to drop you a line on how my personal �story has been going since I started doing things �"your way".� I have checked every "girl strategy" �out there, you know the ones, and have to say that �your system is the most simple, and most effective �one out there.� Your system gives men the start, �and allows them to put their own personal touches �on it.� Then, after some success, (and some �failures, of course, he he) we can come back and �get even more out of it. Awesome, man. �

I'm 27, and have tried your way starting 2 years �ago.� It took me a long time to get "it", but the �journey has been incredible. My friends can't �believe the change in me, and I am now helping �friends who I once thought were so much better �than me.� My relationships with women are so much �more fulfilling now than they ever were when I was �just trying to "get laid". �

I think the one fundamental issue you push, which �is so overlooked, is the idea that a man can be �absolutely honest, know what he wants, and get it. �There are no tricks here, this is about being �absolutely true to yourself. That is what attracts �women to us, our unfaltering honesty, even when we �are afraid that that honesty will push them away.� �The exact opposite is true. �

Buying dinner, flowers, kissing ass, all of that �crap is, at its core element, dishonest.� Being �cocky and funny, being true to yourself, and �acting like a man, is, at core element, totally �honest.� I think women really appreciate that, and �I think it turns them on in a way that even they �don't understand. I am really starting to get this, �and it gets better every day.� ��

Please put out more products, we want them, and �have no problem paying a reasonable price for this �information.� My several different girl "friends"� �each hotter than the next, appreciate this as well. My life has never been so good.� Thanks for making �it that way, I owe you way more than the price of �your products, of which I have purchased all.� God �bless you man, you rock. �

Your friend, �
M �

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yea, it really is amazing that there is a way to have success with women... while still being an honest, straight-shooting guy. �

Whodathunkit, huh?�

�A few more comments... �

Yes, I know how frustrating it is to go searching for good information on how to be more successful with women and dating... only to find half-baked ideas from people who have no clue what they're doing. �

And you're observation that buying women gifts, food, and flower is, at its core, DISHONEST is pretty interesting, too. �

Most of the guys who look at my stuff and say "I don't like your ideas because I don't like to MANIPULATE women" will turn right around and have no problem buying a woman dinner in hopes that she'll sleep with them. �

Go figure. �

Well congrats on sticking with it and getting this part of your life handled. It feels good, and I have a lot of respect for guys who take the initiative to go DO SOMETHING. �

Thanks for your email.�

***SUCCESS STORY*** �

Here's one for the history books: David DeAngelo, �the Man who made Dating Scientific. ��

It's amazing how turned off women are by eager �guys working hard to impress, and how much they �love the composed bad boys who refuse to kiss ass. �At a party I overheard a nearby conversation where �a guy was talking to a hot girl, basically kissing �up to her with the infinitely boring "yeah, I see �what you mean" and "I really identify with that" �type responses. I just sat there with a kind of �crooked half-smile, and in a minute the girl �started talking to me. I used one of your best �rules, Never Give a Woman a Direct Answer Unless �it's No. Before long, this girl was telling me I �acted like a "stone cold psycho" who could "bury �somebody in a field somewhere and never think �twice". Next thing I know she's handing me her �number. Now I have no interest at all in killing �people, but it cracks me up that this chick jokes �about me being a psycho and then wants to go out. �

�JC�
Knoxville, TN �

>>>MY COMMENTS: �

Hey, I never said that women make sense.��

lol...��

You know, several serial killers have all kinds of female "worshippers".��

And have you ever noticed how when some crazy dude escapes from jail, they always find him shackin' up with his old girlfriend?��

Now, fortunately it's not necessary to be a serial killer or felon to attract women (but it doesn't seem to hurt if you are).��

Women DEFINITELY don't feel that powerful "Gut Level Attraction" for "nice, sweet, needy guys".��

ATTRACTION is a process that has developed over a LOOOOOOONG time. It's not something that women think about and "work up to". It's not something that women PLAN.��

ATTRACTION happens for reasons all its own, and you can't CONVINCE a woman to feel it.��

You've obviously found success using these "illogical" techniques that I teach. Good for you, and keep it up. �

***COMMENT***��

Hi �I ordered your double dating series and read �through it this weekend... �

After reading the material it struck me that this �just isn't related to attracting the opposite sex.. it relates to "everything"....like my career, how �other men respect me, etc, etc.. �

Their is only one thing I really want first and �that is self respect, and after that have the guts �to be tough, honest, funny and take a chance.. �

I have been angry with woman for a long time (and �I don't mean in violent way) but more like afraid �to go out with them, or blaming them for not being �interested in me.... �

Its been more like confusion about what do they want,, (and then I don't understand) which ends up �in anger,, and then the cycle continues.... I want �this war to stop with myself. (because its me �being angry with myself). �

I listen to men's pain all the time�and its this �confusion (that men don't understand what woman �want), and also poor self esteem.. so they settle �for less and end up being bossed around and poorly �treated....... �

which ends up as men exploding with anger......... �

I want all men to have their manhood back (and I �mean in a good way) treat woman well and bust them �when they push our buttons.. �

I think I may start having some fun too!!!! ��

Sincerely �

SG ��

>>>MY COMMENTS: �

Yea, I feel ya, dog. �

Here's the scenario: �

You're talking to your hot female co-worker, and she starts talking about her abusive jerk boyfriend who is constantly treating her poorly. �

You sit and listen for an hour, hoping that she'll realize what a great guy you are... and then consider you instead of him. �

At the end of the conversation, she stands up, says "Thanks for being such a GREAT FRIEND", and kisses you on the cheek. �

A week later, she's crying because her jerk BF is at it again. �

It's not too hard to get mad at women for this type of thing. �

I've been there.�

�I've had girlfriends who basically broke up with me or never got together with me in the first place... and instead chose to be with guys who didn't treat them well. �

But you're on the right track here. �

Stop blaming women. �

Instead, start learning how to make them feel that powerful ATTRACTION for YOU. �

Sure, it takes a little effort. But I cannot imagine a greater investment in yourself and your personal life. �

Nice! �

I'm looking forward to hearing a Success Story from you very soon. ��

***SUCCESS STORY*** �

Dave, ��

I have received your emails for quite sometime �now and never did buy the book but after this �weekend I have to get the whole nine yards.� You �have said not to be needy and to treat the women �like little sister brats.� Believe you me it works �amazingly.� I am engaged to a 9 and lately things �seemed to get a little boring.� My girlfriend �started acting a little distant so I thought why �not.� I didn't tell her I loved her as quickly and �quit going for a little kiss when the feeling took �hold.� In other words I took two steps forward and �one step back.� She looked at me kinda funny a �couple of times and then just jumped my bones �right on the couch in the middle of the day when �we were expecting friends over for a bar-b-que.� I �kept the cocky and funny up all night and through �the rest of the weekend.� By Sunday night things �were going just as hot as when we first met.� Your �material kept a fire from dying into ashes.� Hope �your printing doesn't run out before my next �payday. LOL.� ��

�J in Texas

�>>>MY COMMENTS: �

Yea, you'd better get on it... �

Even worse than not being able to meet women in the first place is meeting an EXCEPTIONAL woman and then LOSING her because you're a jackass. �

You do her and yourself a favor, and save your pennies for my ADVANCED SERIES. �

Hell, she'll probably buy it for you if you can't. �

Even though I don't talk about "relationships" very often, I will say that the REAL challenge begins when you have one. �

Keeping a relationship fresh, fun, and interesting is quite a challenge... and you're not going to do it if you turn into a Wussy as time goes on. �

Good job, man. Keep it up. ��

***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN*** �

Dear David: �You sad, misbegotten, hopeless fool. �No wonder �you have such hideous luck with women. �

With your philosophy, it's an absolute guarantee �that will continue. �

Good luck with the sad, misbegotten, hopeless �women you are guaranteed to attract, and that you �doom your pathetic, clueless subscribers to �attract. �

Omigod. ��

>>>MY COMMENTS: �

Wow, your sad, hopeless, misbegotten... and REDUNDANT email really put me in my place. �

And what are you talking about "hideous luck" with women? �I date the smartest, hottest, and most interesting women running around on the planet. �

Get a life, and call up the Redundancy Department Of Redundancy for some tips on how to not sound like a dumbass. �

DAMMIT! I just broke my own rule again of not allowing any letters from people who prove beyond the shadow of a doubt that they are a JACKASS within the first three sentences of their email. �

When will I ever learn? ��

***QUESTION***� ��

Hi, ��I have a quick question.� I started playing bass �because I thought women liked musicians.� that was six years ago.� It's true, I do get a lot of �attention because of my skill at the instrument, �but I can't seem to hang on to a girlfriend. What are your views on women and musicians? ��

>>>MY COMMENTS:�

�I think you need the answer to a DIFFERENT question. �

The question that YOU need the answer to is:�

�"What are my views on women and WUSSIES?" �

...because I'll bet you a dollar that the problem is you turning INTO A WUSSY. �

When a guy can't seem to hold on to a woman, the problem is ALMOST ALWAYS one of the following: �

1) He turns into a clingy, needy Wuss at some point during the relationship. �

2) He becomes PREDICTABLE and BORING at some point during the relationship.�

�So stop doing those things. �

And instead learn how to keep the ATTRACTION building and growing. �

It's possible, but you must LEARN how. �

Stay tuned for more good info. �

Oh, and stop committing the two sins that I mentioned above in the meantime. ��

***QUESTION***�

�I've been reading your emails for about two months �now, and I love your stuff!� Very interesting and �enlightening.� But I have a conundrum that brings �up a good question. �

I'm 32 years old, married for 10 years, three �kids, suburban house, white picket fence, 3.2 pets �in the house, yadda yadda (The .2 pet is just a �pitiful thing, hobbling around on two legs ...) �Kidding. Anyway, I read in an earlier email that �your ideas and methods work even in a marriage �relationship, and that you can still build �attraction even with someone you've been with �forever.� Now, if what I am reading is correct, �your core concept of attraction has to do with �mystery and anticipation, rather than chivalry and �"niceness."� Now, this lady has seen me with my �pants down around my ankles with a fly swatter and �a jar of peanut butter (figuratively speaking); �how can I build anticipation and mystery when she �knows me so well?� If I try the three minute kiss �test thing, she gonna slap my hand and say "Stop �playing with my hair; I just had it colored!� Go �take out the garbage!� And stop playing with the �peanut butter!"� Any insight would be a help!� �

�Thanks! �
D.C.� Northern CA

>>>MY COMMENTS:�

�"...a conundrum that brings up a good question"? �

She's gonna SLAP YOUR HAND? �

And tell you to go take out the garbage? �

Dude, you're in major trouble. �I've heard of men in your position waking up with a key part of their anatomy missing. �

It's not pretty. �

From the sounds of it, you may already be missing some of this aforementioned equipment. �

Better check. �

I'll tell you what... �

You have two basic choices: �

1) Buy your wife some new pants and yourself a new skirt, because it's obvious that this is what she's expecting. �

2) Remove your high-heels, your apron, and your WUSSY ATTITUDE, and HE-BITCH-MAN-SLAP yourself IMMEDIATELY! �

Man, WAKE UP. �

I know, I know... I don't like to talk about marriage and relationships. Again, I just couldn't help myself. �

Look, Mystery and Anticipation don't have anything to do with you walking around with your pants down carrying a fly swatter and a jar of peanut butter. �

It has to do with how you communicate with her... how you touch her... how you kiss her... and how you behave. You obviously need to learn this stuff. �

And by they way, what the hell are you doing walking around in front of your wife with your pants down carrying, OF ALL THINGS, a fly swatter and PEANUT BUTTER? �

Sounds to me like there's something you're not sharing with us. �

And I'm not going even speculate. �

I'm scared. ��

***QUESTION***�

�I just started the DVD series, and I can't say �enough good things about it.� I can already feel �my confidence and self-image improving. ��

I realized something recently that I'm sure you �and a lot of other guys have encountered.� When I �talk to my guy friends about girls I'm dating or �interested in, they tend to encourage and push me �to action.� When I talk to my female friends about �girls I'm dating or interested in, they tend to �say negative things about the girl and plant �doubts in my head.� What do you think about that?� �Even though there's no romantic interest between �me and my female friends, are they acting �competitive on some subconscious level? ��

R.C, Dallas ��

>>>MY COMMENTS: �

THE ANSWER IS YES. �

If you think MEN are competitive, just wait until you start dating more WOMEN. �

You will not believe how competitive women are. �

A friend of mine pointed something out to me a few years ago.�

He said "You know when you go out to a nice bar or club, and all the women are dressed up, have their hair done, and their makeup perfect? Well they're not fixed up like that for the men... it's for the other WOMEN." �

Now, at first that made no sense to me. �

But the more I've paid close attention, the more I realize that it's RIGHT ON. �

Women are VERY competitive. �

In fact, one of the best ways to meet women is to GO OUT with a cute female friend (or more than one). �

Women are always more interested in a guy who already has women around him than a guy who doesn't. �

This is one of the reasons why so many married guys talk about how much more often they're approached by women now that they're married... �

Female psychology is VERY interesting. �

You will learn a TON as you go through my DVD program. It's going to blow your mind. �

If you think you're feeling confident now, just wait until you get further into it... and then go out and try some of the things you're learning... and then come back and watch it again. �

That program is like a treasure map, with all the clues you need to find the gold. �

It has taken me YEARS to really put all of the pieces together... from female behavior and psychology, to ATTRACTION, to the things you need to do to change your self-image and shyness around women into comfort and success. �

Thanks for the comments. �...and if you're reading this right now and you're thinking "Yea, that's what I need... to get this part of my life handled", then guess what? �

YOU'RE RIGHT. �

You do. �

And if you'd prefer to save yourself a few YEARS of trial and error (or more), and a lot of MONEY and TIME, then I suggest you sign up for my free Dating Tips Newsletter, and check out my eBook, "Double Your Dating". �

It will definitely help you take your success with women to a whole new level, whether you're just starting out or you already have some success with women. �

It comes with a 100% money-back guarantee. If you don't meet more women, just send it back for a full refund. No questions, no hassles.�
And I mean it. �

All the details, plus some great audio and video samples are here:

Go here to sign up for my free newsletter and download your copy of my eBook:

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above
�� �� Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook� �� ��
____________________________________________________

David DeAngelo is the author of "Double Your Dating -� What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women", and has taught thousands of men how to be more successful with women and dating.
_________________________________________________________________

Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. "David DeAngelo" and "Double Your Dating" are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

What Women HATE Most About Single Guys

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:11:00 EST

What Women HATE Most About Single Guys

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

By David DeAngelo

If you listen to a group of attractive, single women talking alone over dinner or drinks, the topic will always turn to MEN.

And in most cases, it will eventually turn into a RANT session about how hard it is to find good men to date...

Which will lead to a FULL-ON RAG SESSION about men in general...

...And wind up with a detailed list of all the traits guys have that are ANNOYING AS HELL.

The reality is that single women have an entire laundry list of traits, qualities, and characteristics that they HATE in single guys.

Did you know this?

I didn't think so.

Well, the truth is that up until a few years ago, I didn't know this either.

So take heart in the idea that you're about to learn something that most men on this planet will DIE not knowing.

My hope is that what I'm about to share with you will change how you interact with women FOREVER... and help you meet and date more of the kinds of women you're interested in.

Onward.

FRIENDSHIPS AND ROMANCE

For women, friendships and romantic relationships are two separate things. They are NOT the same.

One can lead to another, but it's RARE when it happens.

Remember that.

One CAN lead to another, but it's RARE.

"Romantic" relationships are very different from "friend" relationships.

While most men would sleep with most of their female "friends" if the woman "came on" to them, most women would NOT sleep with most men that they consider "just friends".

But why is this?

How do women differentiate between "just friends" and "I'll be intimate with you"?

And why is it so hard to become "more than friends" with a woman you've been "just friends" with for a long time?

The answer to this riddle is very interesting to me.

I believe that the answer comes down to understanding HOW women "know" when they want to "be intimate" with a man... and, even MORE
importantly, understanding how women "know" when they DON'T want to "be intimate" with a man...

The thing that tells a woman whether the guy she's with is "friend" material or "lover" material is how she FEELS.

It's a combination of EMOTIONAL feelings and PHYSICAL feelings.

It is NOT logic.

She might USE logic to "rationalize" her decision... or she might USE logic to SOUND like she has a good reason for either "being with" or
"not being with" a particular guy.

But don't let that distract you.

Logic isn't important AT ALL in this context.

So let me say this another way.

A woman FEELS something emotionally and/or physically, then she uses those FEELINGS as the basis for her "decisions" and actions with a
particular guy.

If she feels that "Ewwww Yuck!" feeling, then her "logical" conclusion will probably not be that she wants to date the guy in question.

If she feels that "It's Gettin' Hot In Here" feeling, then her "logical" conclusion will probably be that this guy is interesting and attractive, and a good "choice" to date. At this point she'll take ACTION on her feelings and thoughts...

It goes like this:

FEEL--->THINK--->ACT

First the FEELING, then the THOUGHT... and THEN the action.

Now, with this in mind, let me ask you an important question:

How do most guys behave around women that they're "romantically" interested in?

And another:

What do they do to get the woman that's the object of their desires to be with them?

Take a few minutes to think about this. Make a list if you have paper and pen handy.

I'm serious. I'll wait.

Come back when you're finished.

Now take a look at your list.

I'll bet that almost every single thing on your list was something "external".

In other words, your list probably contains things like "Take her to dinner" and "Give her compliments" and "Buy her flowers" and "Call
her often".

These are all things that demonstrate that he's INTERESTED.

They are NOT things that trigger those emotional and physical feelings inside of a woman that tell her that THIS IS THE GUY.

In other words, men try to use "props" to LET A WOMAN KNOW HE'S INTERESTED...

...HOPING that when the woman sees these displays she'll be interested in him.

Almost NONE of the things men do to court women make women FEEL ANYTHING even remotely similar to "Attraction" and "Arousal".

Of course, you know this.

You've probably done this stuff about a bazillion times. I have, too. I know what it's like to try OVER AND OVER to let a particular woman know that I'm interested... only to have her NOT RESPOND in a "romantic" way.

The PROBLEM with this kind of thing is that it makes TWO HUGE MISTAKES at once.

First, it's just the plain-old wrong way to go. Telling or showing a woman that you "like her" has no effect on how she feels about YOU.

In the moment it sure seems to make sense... "If I show her how I feel, she'll return the feelings".

Duh.

Like I said, it seems like the right thing to do in the moment (when your inner little girl has a big fat crush). But it's not... it will have NO effect on her feelings for you.

And second, it communicates clearly that YOU DON'T GET IT. It tips a woman off INSTANTLY that you're not hip to what's going... and it
kills your chances with her.

Say what?

You mean that doing nice things for women, and trying to show how you feel can actually HURT your chances with a woman?

Yea, it can.

Look, if you've been dating a woman exclusively for six months, and her birthday comes... it's OK to buy her a gift and tell her that you like spending time with her.

YOU'RE ALREADY IN A RELATIONSHIP.

But if you've known a woman for six DAYS and you try this kind of thing, you're going to shoot yourself in the foot.

Women are EXPERTS at recognizing men who DON'T GET IT. And if you DON'T get it, PLUS you're trying to compensate for the fact that
you don't get it with gifts and compliments, then you're REALLY screwed (or not screwed, as the case may be).

Remember what I'm about to tell you.

Burn it into your mind.

Write it on a sticky-note and put it on your computer monitor...

SINGLE, ATTRACTIVE WOMEN WATCH MEN TRY TO WIN THEM OVER ALL DAY LONG. THEY KNOW WHEN A GUY DOESN'T "GET IT"... AND
THEY'RE ANNOYED WHEN A GUY WHO DOESN'T "GET IT" JUST KEEPS TRYING AND TRYING AND TRYING.

Keep in mind that single, attractive women watch guys do this stuff 24/7. They shake their pretty heads and say "He doesn't get it... He doesn't get it... He doesn't get it" over and over and over.

The point is that if you DON'T GET IT, then nothing you do is going to work for you.

The problem is bigger than you can imagine, and you're going to need to take a totally different road to get where you're going...

WHAT ATTRACTIVE WOMEN HATE MOST ABOUT SINGLE GUYS...

Let's return to where we started.

There are a few particular things that REALLY annoy single, attractive women.

One of the reasons that these things annoy women is because they're DEAL KILLERS.

A woman can like everything about you, but if you do these things (or even ONE of these things), it can DESTROY your chances of success with a particular woman.

Here are a few of the BIG things that single women hate:

1) Giving Up Your Status In Exchange For Her Attention And Approval

If I had to describe the one single thing that both annoys women and DESTROYS a guy's chances, it would be this.

It has taken me a long time to see this particular pattern, but it's EVERYWHERE.

Men, in effect, say "Hi, I want your approval and attention. I'm willing to let YOU be the one who's in control... and let YOU call the shots... and do anything to please YOU... if you'll give me your attention and
approval".

But the problem is that women DON'T WANT you to give up your status and "manliness".

Women aren't ATTRACTED to men who act weak and tentative.

Women secretly HATE IT when a guy does something to demonstrate that he'll give away his power in return for approval.

THEY HATE IT!

I could literally write an entire book on this one single concept.

Take a few minutes to think this one over, and maybe write down the ways that you make this mistake with women.

More importantly, think about how you're going to STOP DOING IT IMMEDIATELY.

2) Being Needy, Clingy, And Insecure

When one person "clings" to another person "psychologically", the person who is being "clinged to" RESENTS and REJECTS the needy,
clingy emotional parasite...

This is WUSS behavior at its worst.

If a guy is on the phone with a girl he just met, and she says "Hey, I have to go", he might say "Aw, well... um... OK. Um, will you call me when you get home?".

Or let's say a guy and a girl are out on their first date, and they're walking around in a large department store.

Most guys will follow the woman everywhere, and not leave her side for a minute.

If she wanders away, he'll come find her IMMEDIATELY.

He'll stay physically close to her, as if he's afraid she'll leave without him.

And an even worse example is a guy who is so emotionally insecure that he actually ASKS a woman to tell him that he's nice, fun, interesting, etc.

"Do you think I'm interesting?"

"Do you think we could ever have a relationship?"

"Am I your type?"

Women HATE this stuff. It makes them shiver with the heebie-jeebies. It makes them want to RUN AWAY.

3) Not Leading - And Even Worse, Trying To Get Her To Lead

Women have WUSS-DAR.

One of the things that triggers a woman's WUSS-DAR is a man who FOLLOWS.

The REAL problem is that most women won't try to LEAD naturally.

So you've got a situation where a man is trying to FOLLOW a woman who isn't LEADING.

He's looking for little cues so he knows where to go and what to do... but he isn't getting them.

So what does he do?

He ASKS for them!

He says "So, I was thinking of maybe taking you to Olive Garden for dinner... how does that sound?".

Everything about the way he asks says to the woman "I'm trying to figure out what you want me to do... please help me know how you want me to act, where you want me to take you, and what you want me to say".

This is ATTRACTION DEATH!

men who don't lead, and even worse, try to get a woman to lead, ANNOY THE HELL OUT OF SINGLE WOMEN.

They HATE IT!

4) Using Insecure, Approval-Seeking, Low-Status Posture, Gestures, Voice Tone, And Body Language

There's a term that single, attractive, in-demand women use to describe men who use weak, approval-seeking posture, gestures,
comments, and mannerisms...

The term is "NICE".

"He's nice... but... there's no chemistry."

This is one of those areas that's not easy to talk about.

Since SO DAMN MANY GUYS do this stuff, it's almost impossible to explain.

It's like trying to tell a fish that they're not going to get anywhere in life
if they stay wet.

The fish doesn't even KNOW it's wet in the first place.

But let me try.

This is important.

Go spend a day observing couples.

Go places where couples that have just met spend time together.

Bars, clubs, coffee shops, whatever.

Now watch the GUYS.

Watch how they lean towards the women.

Watch how they raise their eyebrows in exaggerated response to women's comments.

Watch how they slump over, let their shoulders fall forward, and smile fake-ly at whatever the women say.

If you're close enough, listen to how men ask questions and make comments with a voice tone that says "I'm insecure and I'm trying
to be extra nice to compensate for it".

You'll see it EVERYWHERE.

In fact, you'll see it so much that you'll probably write me back to tell me that I'm the one who's crazy, and that since it happens so much, it must be "the right way".

Well, it's not.

If there's one thing that triggers an attractive single woman's WUSS-DAR, it's a man's posture, gestures, eye contact, voice tone, etc.

It all happens in an INSTANT.

Women read this stuff and interpret it as instantly and accurately as you read and interpret the cover of Playboy.

NO ANALYSIS NECESSARY.

I'd say that probably 90% of all men alive today INSTANTLY disqualify themselves with women because of this problem.

Their voice tone, gestures, posture, etc. TELEGRAPH the message that they're a WUSS.

They do a thousand weird little things to let a woman know that they're uncomfortable and "not being themselves".

And you guessed it...

Single women HATE IT!

5) Not Understanding That She's A Woman And You're A Man

I'm about to get philosophical on your ass, so be cool.

When it comes down to it, most men don't understand women.

But the REAL kicker is that most men don't understand MEN, either!

Most guys don't know what it's like to get in touch with their MALE NATURE.

Combine these two issues, and you get a guy who behaves in ways that DO NOT trigger ATTRACTION in women.

Women have a "nature". A female nature.

Men also have a "nature". You guessed it, it's a MALE nature.

Women are coy. They like to play hard to get. They like to enjoy the chase. They love anticipation. They love to "let a guy catch them"...

Men are competitive. Men are dominant. Men like to play rough games, win things, and rule their territory.

Well guess what?

Most men don't BEHAVE like men when they're in the presence of a woman that they "like".

And since most men don't understand female human nature, they don't demonstrate that they "get it" when they're with women that they "like".

Women like men. Men like women. There are POWERFUL causes at play here.

When you're around a woman you like, don't act like a GIRLY-MAN. It's not sexy, and it's not attractive...

And single women HATE IT!

6) Not Being Interesting To Be Around

Underneath most behavior that I see most guys acting out is a "core belief" that goes like this:

"I don't believe that an attractive woman would want to be around me just because she enjoys my presence... so I make up for it by saying and doing certain things that I hope she'll enjoy... and if she enjoys those
other things enough, then maybe she'll want to spend more time with me."

Heavy, man.

Well guess what? Most attractive single women KNOW that if a guy isn't interesting to be around, they she's eventually going to go CRAZY being around him.

In other words, no amount of material gifts, compliments, dinners, and other "displays" will EVER compensate for a lack of BEING INTERESTING.

Here's a profound thought:

I and several other guys I know have many women who call us often... just because they enjoy being around us.

These women would be happy just to be in the same room with us... and enjoy our company.

And yes, these women CALL US.

Often.

Material gifts, food, flowers, and other "displays" have ZERO lasting value to a woman when it comes to how she FEELS about you...

An attractive single woman wants a guy who LIGHTS HER UP. She wants to FEEL GOOD.

She wants mystery... she wants to laugh... she wants a challenge... she wants sexual tension...

If you're using compliments, gifts, food, and other "displays" to get a woman's attention... you need to ask yourself a tough question:

Is it because you don't believe that a woman would want to be around you just to be around you?

Because if you don't know how to be INTERESTING to a woman, then no amount of compensation is going to fix the problem.

If you're boring, predictable, and uninteresting, then you're never going to have women calling YOU to hang out.

Oh, and women HATE IT.

7) Not Understanding Attraction

This is a BIGGIE.

You hear me talking about it all the time, right?

Maybe now that you've read this newsletter you'll have a better context to understand what I'm about to tell you...

If you "get it" with women, it's SUPER INTERESTING and ATTRACTIVE to them.

Women can INSTANTLY FEEL IT when they're with a guy who "gets it".

Women know very quickly if they're talking to a guy who understands himself and women... and who enjoys creating and building sexual tension.

Women know if a guy speaks the SECRET LANGUAGE of "Sexual Communication".

If he doesn't, then she stops all communication on that level.

If he does, then it continues.

ATTRACTION Isn't A Choice.

Attraction is an emotional and physical RESPONSE... and you can't "convince" a woman to feel it with logic, gifts, and NICENESS.

Attraction is the result of a woman meeting a man who understands how attraction works... and who knows what to do in each specific
situation to progress to the next level.

The PROBLEM with ATTRACTION, and with success with women in general is that the things you need to DO to be successful are NOT
OBVIOUS.

They're "counter intuitive", in many cases.

In other words, they're the OPPOSITE of what you'd THINK would make sense.

You have to do things like CREATE TENSION... stop doing something that she likes... give her time to miss you... etc.

And if you don't understand ATTRACTION, a woman is going to KNOW IT.

And guess what?

Single women HATE IT when a man doesn't understand ATTRACTION and how to communicate on this "other level".

Now that I've shared the mistakes, you need the next piece of the puzzle. You need to get an education on how attraction works for women... and the RIGHT things to do up front to give her those emotional/physical feelings inside.

Right now you're probably feeling that excited "Ah Ha!" feeling.

That's because you understand something at a different level... you've used your mind to understand something complex... and you feel good about bettering yourself.

Well this is just the TIP of the iceberg.

As educational as this has been, this is only the beginning.

If you're starting to realize how important it is to get this area of your life handled, then I recommend you make a commitment and take your education to a WORLD CLASS level.

And what's the best way to do that?

Well, I've spent the last several years of my life figuring out exactly what does and doesn't work with women.

I figured this stuff out for MYSELF... and then I took what I've learned and put it all together to help others learn as well.

My Double Your Dating eBook represents THOUSANDS of hours of research, testing, getting to know guys who were successful with women, and generally organizing every level of this knowledge into an easy-to-understand system that ANY guy can use to increase his success with women and dating.

And I'll tell you something...

It works.

This eBook is the most advanced and effective program of it's kind available anywhere at ANY price.

And I have an offer that you're not likely to find repeated anywhere else...

I'll send it to you at MY RISK.

You can try it out for a full 7 days, and if you don't see MASSIVE results, just let me know... and pay nothing.

That's right, you can try it FREE for
7 days.

Double Your Dating
Click the Book Cover Above

On top of all that, I'd like to invite you to sign up for my free, 3-times-weekly dating tips newsletter.

There's no obligation, and you can easily remove yourself anytime. And believe me, I hate spam as much as you do. You don't have to worry about me ever sharing your email address with anyone.

Go here to download my eBook and to sign up:

� Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook �

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

________________________________________________________________

� 2001-2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc, All Rights Reserved." Double Your Dating" and "David DeAngelo" are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

A Secret Women Know That Men Don't

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:09:00 EST

A Secret Women Know But Men Don't

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

By David DeAngelo

I'd like to tell you a story...

It's a story that you might find strangely familiar. Don't be alarmed.

Once upon a time, there was a man who was very attracted to a particular woman.

At first, she was just another attractive woman... but the more he got to know her, the more he began to feel attracted to her... and the more time he spent with her, the more that
attraction grew into a deep emotional attachment and affection for her.

But there was one problem.

As his emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, he also grew more and more insecure.

Why?

Because he couldn't tell whether or not she felt the same way towards him.

Sometimes she would say things like "You are so important to me" and "I'm glad that you're in my life"... but nothing ever progressed past the "friendship" stage.

There was an occasional hug, an occasional kiss on the cheek from her... and once she even held his hand for a long time while he talked about an emotional issue.

But something was wrong with the picture.

She just wasn't acting like a woman that was "falling in love". She was acting like a friend.

The insecurity that he felt became a spiral that amplified itself... and the more insecure he became, the more afraid he grew of "screwing things up" by kissing her or asking her to be his girlfriend.

Plus, the more insecure he became, the less time she seemed to want to spend with him.

After spending many days and nights obsessing over this girl, the man finally arrived at the conclusion that if she only knew how HE FELT, that she would feel the same way.

So he made a bold move.

He TOLD HER how he was felt.

He confessed that he was in love, and that he would do anything to be with her.

She looked at him with compassion in her eyes and said "Thank you... I really mean that... but I don't want to mess up our friendship... you're too important to me...".

This only confused the man more.

He didn't know how to take it...

Did it mean that she really loved him too, but that she was afraid of something?

Did it mean that she wasn't ready for a long- term relationship?

Did it mean that she didn't love him, but that she was trying to give him a hint?

Did it mean that he hadn't tried hard enough?

Did it mean that he needed to put everything on the line and REALLY let her know how he felt?

He finally decided that he couldn't go on like this anymore... he had to be with her.

He had to make sure that she knew just how much he wanted to be with her... so he took a big step, bought her a symbolic gift, and wrote her a long, long letter... again confessing his feelings.

And then the unthinkable happened.

She didn't reply.

He called her three times a day for almost a week before reaching her.

She made an excuse about being very busy, and said "I'll try to give you a call soon, I have to go"... and hung up...

...but he never got a call back.

Over the following months, the man tried desperately to understand what went wrong... and what happened.

THE END

OK, I'm back.

Now, wasn't that a sweet story?

Heart warming, huh?

I know, I should keep my day job, and not take up writing romance novels...

Now, let's talk about that story.

That story is basically a MYTH.

And I'm not talking about FICTION here.

I'm talking about a story that rings true for a great majority of men. A story that is timeless. A story that resonates at a deep level because you can IDENTIFY with it.

And why does this particular story resonate for most men?

Because we've all been there in one way or another... at one time or another... and many of us have been there OFTEN in our lives.

Another thing that gives this particular story a lot of power is the powerful negative emotions that it stirs... as a result of the powerful negative experiences that it reminds us of...

Stories and situations like this one really FASCINATE me.

They fascinate me because I see them as an opportunity to UNDERSTAND and SOLVE the puzzles that they represent.

In this particular situation I think there is a solution.

And it lies in understanding a secret that women know but MEN DON'T.

And that secret comes down to the reality thatm if a woman isn't ATTRACTED to a man, all of his attempts to confess his love, convince her to like him, and court her BACKFIRE.

In other words, they not only DON'T WORK, they actually make things WORSE.

In other words, the very things that a man does to try to make a woman LIKE HIM make her NOT like him. They make her run.

All those great intentions and emotional dedication actual cause the man feeling them to do things that make her go away.

It sucks.

And I hope that by explaining the process of how this happens to you I'll help you avoid this painful situation in your own future...

THE "INSTANT EWWW"

I'm always fascinated by the idea that we humans don't always understand the message that we're communicating to others...

So often we think that because we WANT to communicate a message that others are going to NATURALLY understand what we're trying to say.

Have you ever seen a guy in a foreign car that has wheels on it that cost more than the car itself... with his stereo blasting... and a muffler that somehow AMPLIFIES the raw sound of the 4-cylinder motor...?

Have you ever thought to yourself "I don't think that car is communicating the message to women that he thinks it is"...?

Yea, I have too.

Well here's the deal:

If you do something to "let a woman know how you feel"... but she isn't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to backfire.

It's going to trigger a feeling that like to call the "Instant Ewww".

The Instant Ewww is just as powerful as the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION.

Once a woman feels it, YOU'RE DONE.

It's over.

It's like hammering a RAILROAD SPIKE into the coffin.

Once a woman feels the Instant Ewww, she will start behaving differently.

In short, she'll disappear.

So where did I get the concept of the "Instant Ewww"?

I got it from WOMEN.

I have actually heard SEVERAL women use the word "Ewww" when describing how they felt about a guy that was "confessing his love"... of course, these were guys that weren't loved in return.

So what causes the Instant Ewww?

And why would a woman feel it towards a man who was trying to be nice... a guy who was giving her a gift or telling her how he feels?

Because if you think about it from HER perspective, you'll realize that the moment a you do something to "confess", you have created a TURNING POINT in the relationship.

Up until that point, you were harmless.

I mean, women always know how men feel.

She already knew you wanted her.

She knew it from the beginning.

But now that you've started pursuing her and talking about how you feel, you've created a NEGATIVE TENSION that is VERY uncomfortable.

You've triggered an emotion that is repulsive to women. And it does repel them.

In summary...

You can't "make a woman like you" or "change how she feels about you" by doing nice things for her...

Doing "nice" things for a woman who isn't attracted to you HURTS you. It backfires. Worse, it creates the "Instant Ewww" feeling that makes it so she'll NEVER like you.

Men make this mistake over and over again in life because they're doing what MAKES SENSE to them. They're doing it because they don't have an understanding of ATTRACTION.

I mean, If you have a friend, and you like them, and you want to make them like you more... and you do some nice thing for them, they will probably like you more.

On the other hand...

If you have a woman that you "like" in a romantic way, and she doesn't "feel it" for you, and you do something nice for her because you want HER to like you more, it will BACKFIRE... and she will not only NOT like you more, she will most likely distance herself from you.

Guys think that they need to communicate when they like a woman... as if that's part of the necessary process of getting a girl.

In their minds, it goes like this:

Like her>Tell her you like her>She likes you

Well remember... if you follow this pattern yourself with women who aren't ATTRACTED to you, then it's going to BACKFIRE.

If she's not into you, then it goes like THIS:

She thinks of you as a friend>You tell her you like her>She gets the "Instant Ewwws" and never wants to be around you again...

THE ANSWER

There are really TWO answers to this problem.

The first answer is what to do if you're in a situation where you like a particular girl, but you don't know if she likes you back.

DON'T GET HEAVY WITH HER.

Don't buy her a big gift and write a love
letter...

Don't send her ten dozen roses to her work with a not that says "From your secret admirer".

Don't call her three times a day.

And DON'T CONFESS YOUR LOVE for her.

If you want to know how she feels about you, KISS HER (and use "The Kiss Test" that you learned on my website and in my book).

As a rule of thumb, don't get heavier than HER. Use SIGNALS from her to find out how she feels... and if you don't know how to read and create those signals, then LEARN.

Asking a woman if she's interested in your in a romantic way, or if you are "her type" will actually DESTROY the chances that she'll like
you.

Really.

The SECOND answer is to not get into this particular situation in the FIRST PLACE. Avoid it entirely.

And how does one do that?

One does that by creating ATTRACTION from the beginning.

One does that by understanding the dynamics of how and why women have the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION triggered.

One does that by knowing what you're doing FROM THE BEGINNING.

And what's the best way to learn THAT skill?

I thought you'd never ask...

The very best way to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you is to get yourself a copy of my eBook, Double Your Dating.

I've spent several years now studying the ways that men who are "naturals" communicate using their words, voice tone, and body language that makes them MAGNETIC to women.

And I'll tell you... it's not magic.

You don't have to be rich, handsome, or young.

And you don't have to be LUCKY.

What you DO have to do is LEARN.

It's a skill, and I honestly believe that ANY man can learn it if he wants.

But you're not likely to figure it out by "trial and error". Many of the keys to making women feel ATTRACTION aren't "obvious" at all.

In fact, many of them make no sense... and they're the LAST thing you'd do in a particular situation if you didn't know the SECRETS.

I'm telling you, this book will show you the way. I guarantee that this program will INSTANTLY change how you behave around women.

And it will start getting you results IMMEDIATELY.

In addition, I'd also like to invite you to sign up for my free dating tips newsletter.

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

It's free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone, and you can easily remove yourself anytime with no hassles (and no, I'll never pull any of these tricks where I send you a bunch of unwanted junk email when you try to remove yourself).

It's JAM PACKED with dozens and dozens of specific strategies for overcoming fear, approaching women, getting phone numbers and email address from women quickly, great inexpensive or even free date ideas, and advice on how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and easily.

If you'd like to take your success with women and dating to the next level, and have the kind of success that you've always wanted, then go sign up for my free newsletter, get all the details, and check out some great free samples of the eBook located here:

� Free Dating Tips Newsletter And Download eBook �

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

_____________________________________________________________
Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks of David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

The Ten Most Dangerous Mistakes YOU Probably Make With Women

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:09:00 EST

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

�The Ten Most Dangerous Mistakes YOU Probably
Make With Women�
And What To Do About It...�

Here Are The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Fail With Women�And How To Make Sure YOU Avoid Every One Of These Deadly Common Mistakes...

-By David DeAngelo, Author Of �Double Your Dating�

MISTAKE #1: Being
Too Much Of A �Nice Guy�

Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted "nice" guys?

Of course you have.

Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in YOU.

What's going on here?

It's actually very simple...

Women don't base their choices of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for them.

And guess what?

Being nice doesn't make a woman FEEL that powerful ATTRACTION.

And being NICE doesn't make a woman CHOOSE you.

I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to ACCEPT... but GET OVER IT.

Until you accept this FACT and begin to act on it, you'll NEVER have the success with women that you want.

MISTAKE #2: Trying To
�Convince Her To Like You"

What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they REALLY like... but she's just notinterested?

Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.

Well, I have news for you... YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE HOW A WOMAN "FEELS" WHEN IT COMES TO ATTRACTION!

Never, ever, EVER.

You cannot CONVINCE a woman to feel differently about you with "logic and reasoning".

Think about it.

If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that FEELING by being "reasonable" with her?

But we all do it.

When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.

Bad idea. One that will never work.

MISTAKE #3: Looking To Her
For Approval Or Permission

In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), us guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission".

Another HORRIBLE idea.

Women are NEVER attracted to the types of men who kiss up to them... EVER.

Don't get me wrong here.

You don't have to treat women BADLY for them to like you.

But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things", think again.

You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get ANNOYED at men who seek their approval.

Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if Wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her...

MISTAKE #4: Trying To �Buy� Her Affection With Food And Gifts

How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her REJECT you for someone who didn't treat her even HALF as well as you did?

If you're like me, then you've had it happen a LOT.

Well guess what?

It's only NATURAL when this happens...

That's right, I said NATURAL.

When you do these things, you send a clear message:

"I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection".
Your good intentions usually come across to women as over-compensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as MANIPULATION.

MISTAKE #5: Sharing
�How You Feel� Too Early In
The Relationship With Her

Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.

Attractive women are rare.

And they get a LOT of attention from men.

Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are being approached in one way or another ALL THE
An attractive woman is often approached several times a DAY by men who are interested. This translate into dozens of times per week, and often HUNDREDS of times per month.

And guess what?

Attractive women have usually dated a LOT of men.

That's right. They have EXPERIENCE.

They know what to expect.

And one thing that turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than just about anything is a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, REALLY like you" after one or two dates.

This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.

Don't do it. Lean back. Relax.

There's a much better way...

MISTAKE #6: Not �Getting� How Attraction Works For Women

Women are VERY different from men when it comes to ATTRACTION.

You need to accept this fact, and deal with it.

When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he INSTANTLY feels a sexual attraction.

But does the same apply for women?

Do women feel sexual attraction to men based mostly on looks? Or is something else going on?

Well, after studying this topic for over five full years now, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things OTHER than looks.

Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?

Think about it.

Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're attracted to the way a man makes them FEEL than they are to looks alone.

If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

But it's not an accident. You have to LEARN how to do this.

And ANY guy can learn how...

MISTAKE #7: Thinking That It
Takes Money And Looks

One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started... because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age.

And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.

But MOST women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks.

There are personality traits that attract women like a magnet...

And if you learn what they are and how to use them, YOU can be one of these guys.

YOU DO NOT have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall, or handsome.

Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that YOU feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.

MISTAKE #8: Giving Away
All Of Your Power To Women

Earlier I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission.

Well, another similar tactic that a lot of guys use is GIVING AWAY THEIR POWER to women.

Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.

Another bad idea...

Women are NEVER attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to Wussies!

MISTAKE #9: Not Knowing
EXACTLY What To Do In Each
Type Of Situation With Women

Now I'm going to blow your mind...

A woman ALWAYS knows what you're thinking.

Women are approximately TEN TIMES better than men at reading body language. That's ten TIMES.

I know, it might be hard to believe. But for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.

And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly HOW to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!

And this goes for ALL aspects of women and dating...

Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything.

If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and LOSE EVERYTHING.

And you KNOW it.

It is VITALLY important that you know EXACTLY how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.

MISTAKE #10: Not Getting HELP

This is the biggest mistake of all.

This is the mistake that keeps most men from EVER having the kind of success with women that they truly want.

I know, guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help.

Hey, I've been there myself.

Let me tell you a little about me and how I figured out how to be successful with women...

About five years ago I became fed up with the fact that I didn't know how to approach, meet, and get dates with women that I was attracted to.

It frustrated the hell out of me.

One night I was out with a friend, and I saw a woman I wanted to ask out, but I just couldn't get up the nerve to do it. I can still remember that night... right on the spot I made the decision to do whatever it took to learn how to be successful with women and dating.

Well, after a lot of hard work and trying all kinds of crazy things, I finally figured it all out.

I can now approach just about any woman and get her number almost instantly. I've dated models, I've dated actresses, and I've dated nice, normal, regular girls as well.

It has been a very rewarding experience. I no longer feel that sick, insecure feeling... like I don't know how to meet women... and I might wind up alone.

I know that anytime, anywhere, I can go out and meet attractive women.

I've written a book on the topic, and I've done seminars on both coasts of the United States... and taught tens of thousands of men all around the world.

I Now Have A FREE, Three-Times-
A-Week Email Newsletter...

...But the REALLY GREAT news is that I now publish a free email newsletter three times a week that teaches any guy how to increase his success with women DRAMATICALLY.

And I'd like to invite you to sign up.

It's free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone, and you can easily remove yourself anytime with no hassles (and no, I'll never pull any of these tricks where I send you a bunch of unwanted junk email when you try to remove yourself).

Of course, it even get's better than that...

In addition to my free email newsletter, I also have a killer downloadable eBook that you can download right now and be reading in literally MINUTES from right now.

It's JAM PACKED with dozens and dozens of specific strategies for overcoming fear, approaching women, getting phone numbers and email address from women quickly, great inexpensive or even free date ideas, and how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and easily.

To sign up for my free three-times-a-week newsletter AND download your copy of this online eBook, just go here:

Free Newsletter And Download eBook

Oh, And One More Thing...

In this day and age of "instant gratification", I realize that this might just sound like another late-night info-mercial promising to make you rich by next week.

Well, that's not the case.

I've spent a lot of time, effort, and energy writing this eBook. I wanted to design and create a program that ANY guy could easily understand and start using IMMEDIATELY to meet and date more women... without having to lie, do dishonest things, or be "manipulative".

I now believe that ANY man can be more successful with women and dating, and I get emails every day with success stories from guys who are using this program to meet and date wonderful women.

I know, I know... an ebook that can teach a regular guy how to be more successful in the dating world? No way.

Well believe me, this program will DRAMATICALLY increase your success with women... I absolutely guarantee it 100%.

If you'd like to take your success with women and dating to the next level, and have the kind of success that you've always wanted, then go sign up for my free newsletter, get all the details, and check out some great free samples of the eBook located here:

Free Newsletter And Download eBook

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days
Click the Book Cover Above

And I'll talk to you again soon.

Your Friend,

David DeAngelo

P.S. Do some friends a favor, and FORWARD this article to their email addresses. It might be the biggest gift you ever give them.

_____________________________________________________________
Copyright 2008 David DeAngelo Communications Inc., All Rights Reserved. David DeAngelo and Double Your Dating are trademarks of David DeAngelo Communications Inc.

How to Be a Nice Guy (And Still Get Women)

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:08:00 EST
Have you ever heard that old familiar lament:

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook
"Nice Guys Finish Last, Jerks Get Laid?" At first glance, it would seem that is true. There are a lot of Jerks out there who are able to attract tons and tons of women. And there are a lot of Nice Guys who struggle with getting girls, and feel frustrated. After all, who wants to have to be a jerk in order to get women? Here's the thing... YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE A JERK TO GET WOMEN! You just have to change a few things you tend to be "nice" about. For instance: 1. Social Restrictions We tend to believe that there are "acceptable" and "unacceptable" things to do around women. And while this is true to some extent, Nice Guys are often wrong about the limits of what is acceptable. Like being sexual around women. Many Nice Guys believe this is "inappropriate behavior." But that's wrong! Being sexual around a woman is a very powerful way of communicating your interest in her. Little things like flirting and joking about sex can go a long way into making you a potential lover instead of just a potential "friend." 2. Inability To Act Too often, "Nice Guys" wait around for the girl to make the first move to initiate romance. This is a DEADLY mistake! Women take their cues from the men they're with. If you want to escalate into a physical relationship, you have to be the one to make the first move. This can be scary. It's possible to get rejected. But if you don't do it, you won't succeed! Actions speak louder than words, and if you allow yourself to act and go in for a kiss, or not be afraid to touch her, then you communicate all the right things... Things like aggressiveness, confidence, and sexuality -- all things women find irresistibly attractive! 3. Diarrhea Of The Mouth Way too many Nice Guys like to talk about boring stuff. They do nothing to captivate the girl. Their stories don't inspire romance or attraction. In short: Nice Guys are neutered! The real trick with women is to be playful! Have fun with them! Crack jokes. Tease them. Have a good time. Show her a little bit of attention instead of focusing on yourself -- but don't take yourself for granted either! If you just talk, and talk, and talk without knowing what you're saying, you're going to bore the girl you're with. And girls who are bored with you will not be attracted to you. If you look at the three points above, you can see that the Jerks who get all the women do these things. BUT, Nice guys can do them too, and not have to act like a complete horses ass to do them! You can still be the Nice Guy you've always been, but just change three simple tactics and see a drastic improvement in your success with women. Here's a recent success story I got from a Nice Guy who followed my advice... NICE GUY SUCCESS STORY>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Dude, your stuff works! I went out last night and took the lead much more. Also, thinking of what you told me, I pressed forward on every sexual innuendo opening that popped up. It is amazing how quickly girls opened up. I ended up talking to this guy and the two girls with him about hotel porn and the fact that everybody, including women watches it (something I'd never thought I'd talk to women about before). We talked about Michael Ninn and porn with real storylines and started dreaming up porn careers for ourselves. Anyway, long story short, when they closed the club we ended up at his place nearby; nice and big with a Japanese garden. We joked around and the girls did stupid dances to the indian electronica that was playing and eventually at like four am we paired off. I just got back! That is the quickest result I have had yet and it was fun to be so open. Thanks! R. (Recovering Nice Guy) >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> If you want to have really effective successes and turn your luck around, you really need to read my book The Art Of Approaching. This information is truly LETHAL stuff. The Nice Guy above emailed me a few times about his problems, and I gave him the EXACT SAME information I just gave you. And look what it got him! If you don't start applying the strategies in my book, you'll have to be happy with what you're getting right now. But if you can imagine going out to meet women armed with the "secret weapons" I give you that can help boost your confidence and get beautiful girl after beautiful girl to date you... Well, I'm sure you're starting to realize the possibilities. Click the book cover below...

What Women Want in a Relationship

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:07:00 EST
I received a rather short, sweet, and intriguing question recently...

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook
A QUESTION>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Do women really know what they are looking for in a relationship? --from Chilibean MY ANSWER>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Now that's a loaded question if I ever heard one, lol. Here's the thing... Different women have different expectations about what they want from a man and a relationship. For example, a young woman may not know what she wants in a relationship simply because she isn't experienced enough to know what's important to her yet. A more mature woman, one who's been in a lot of different relationships, may know exactly what she's looking for in a relationship. But there's one thing all types of women know about before they get into a relationship... They know what they're ATTRACTED to! See, the female mind processes things in this manner: 1. Is there something attracting me to this man? 2. Will this man be a good fit for me in the long term? Usually, number 1 will kick in almost immediately within the first few minutes of meeting a man. They'll start evaluating the man's attraction quotient. Number two won't kick in until number one has been met. This means that if you can get a woman really turned on, or even in bed, then she'll immediately start evaluating you based on your potential for a long term relationship. Women who try and do this backwards, by getting into a relationship and hoping the attraction will grow, usually end up disappointed. When it comes to what women are actually looking for in a relationship, you can expect these factors to come into play: 1. How well does the man treat her? 2. What is the level of attraction occurring? 3. How good is he in bed? 4. How strong is the emotional connection? 5. How good of a provider is he? Let's quickly go through these five female relationship factors... The first factor can be misleading. All women want to be treated well, but they don't necessarily want to be treated like goddesses to be fawned over. (Sure, that's okay from time to time, but too much of a good thing is a bad thing...) Women want to feel like the man they are with is loving and strong. So if you treat them in a way where they know you care, know they are safe, but know you won't take their bullcrap, they will feel well treated. The next factor has to do with what we discussed earlier. If they are still feeling sexual attraction towards you, then this factor is met. But if things have fizzled, this could be a deal breaker. Most women aren't used to having men who are good in bed. So if you can please her between the sheets, then chances are she'll see you as a "keeper." If there is a strong emotional connection, a woman will want to be around you. She will feel connected to you and want to please you. This is a very important factor in any relationship. Women who don't have a strong emotional connection to the men they are in a relationship with will tend to cheat on them, because they aren't being fulfilled emotionally. Finally, a man who is a good provider will make a woman feel safe and cared for. Many women will gravitate towards men who can pay their bills, even if all the other relationship factors are absent. But this doesn't mean that type of relationship is a happy or stable one (for either party). Showing a woman you're a good provider is probably the least important factor in a strong relationship, but it is still a factor. But the first step you need to be aware of before you can even begin to THINK about relationships, is the initial ATTRACTION phase. And that phase starts with how you MEET her. I personally believe that any man has the potential to attract any woman. If they know what to do. In my book, The Art Of Approaching, you're going to learn some super-ninja techniques that will lay the foundation for a great relationship. You'll learn how to plant the initial seeds of attraction that will blossom into a good relationship. Click the book cover below...

Secrets, Women Don't Want You to Know

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 20:06:00 EST
You are about to learn the greatest secret regarding how to date women of all time.

The Art of Approaching Women

Double Your Dating
Free for 7 Days

The Complete Self Esteem Workbook
Think back to all those times when you've felt awkward or uncomfortable around women. Think back to all the times you've gotten turned down for a date. All the times your phone calls went unreturned. It's time to say good-bye to that kind of dating. The dating where you have NO CONTROL. Because I am going to share with you the exact methods you can use to get any woman you want. No - this isn't some outlandish claim. It's all possible... and even stranger: It's SUPER easy. The secret of how to successfully date any woman you desire comes from women THEMSELVES. Face it: there is no one better to learn about women from than actual women. Most women have very similar experiences with men. They know what guys do right, what they do wrong, and more importantly... THEY KNOW WHAT YOU DON'T ABOUT HOW TO MAKE THEM FEEL ATTRACTED TO YOU! Now, it's time you HARNESSED this knowledge and make it more powerful than DYNAMITE. This is the type of insider info many men would pay THOUSANDS of dollars for. And up to know, this is the type of information women would only whisper about to their best friends. In short: This is the type of informationthat will change your life, Immediately. Click the book cover below...